


The Guard and The Stargazer

by Chesh_cat



Category: HIStory3 - 那一天 | HIStory3: Make Our Days Count (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Historical, M/M, POV Multiple
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-11
Updated: 2020-12-04
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:46:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 22,759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25844524
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chesh_cat/pseuds/Chesh_cat
Summary: I once tweeted "Petition to cast Wayne and Chunchih as a side couple in a historical drama. HaoTing x XiGu pairing needs a happy ending! At least in another historical period!" and, you know, now I hope I will have enough inspiration to finish this. I should preface by saying that English is not my mother tongue. Second, please be aware that I'm not a historian, I just use common knowledge and make generalizations. Third, I hope you enjoy!
Relationships: Xiang Haoting/Yu Xigu
Comments: 14
Kudos: 42





	1. Chapter 1

_“Maybe I’ll see you in another life, if this one wasn’t enough.”_  
— Florence + the Machine

The sun beat down hotly on the courtyard of the royal palace where the King held a lengthy meeting with his ministers, advisors, family members, and other less important consultants on the subject of the next six month’s budget. It was a tedious task for Hao Ting to suffer their endless bickering in this kind of weather and in his heavy armor. Beads of sweat rolled down his neck and spine. Sure, all those important court subjects were sitting on their soft cushions in the cool shadow of a huge canopy while the King himself sat on his throne facing them, but Hao Ting, a mere royal guard, could not move from his place at the back of the court near the entrance doors, bathed in summer sunshine.

He kept himself entertained by watching his love interest, a young man who sat in the farthest row from the monarch and closest to him, and who, although voicing no opinions, watched the discussion with great interest. His name was Yu Xi Gu, and he held no definite status among King’s men as he had belonged to late Queen’s people, and was given the right to stay in the palace thanks to the new Queen’s grace.

Yu Xi Gu’s sparsely decorated white clothes — that showed he belonged to the court — hugged his slim body, and long black hair tied up in a knot added even more elegance to his image. Hao Ting noticed how Yu Xi Gu’s small butt shifted on the silk pillow as he turned to face the next speaker, and he gulped, forgetting all about the scorching sun, the strain of his muscles from standing still for too long, the boredom and even the pain in his left eye caused by the lack of sleep. He couldn’t take his eyes off of the lithe figure of Xi Gu who looked, as always, serious and aloof, and who seemed to be watching everyone with stern eyes, but who in reality — Hao Ting could tell — was transfixed by the discussion, soaking in every word.

Hao Ting remembered last night’s conversation with his best friend about the nature of his obsession with Yu Xi Gu. Honestly speaking, Xi Gu and he had had a history of unpleasant encounters that led to some unexpected results. First, Hao Ting’s friends urged him to take action when his then-lover became infatuated with “baby Yu” (as her friends called Yu Xi Gu), so he came to “his rival” with some rushed and immature accusations, demanding an apology. Yu Xi Gu only scoffed at him, as if he couldn’t be bothered to answer Hao Ting’s words. That made Hao Ting reckless. In an idiotic attempt at taking revenge and attracting the other’s attention, he later stole Yu Xi Gu’s clothes when the other was bathing. That occasion had almost caused irreparable damage when princesses’ maids went to check the royal bathhouse and found Yu Xi Gu “looking indecent,” and only prince Xia De’s plea to the King managed to save the young man from corporal punishment and losing all the privileges in the palace. That day Yu Xi Gu punched Xiang Hao Ting and asked him never to show his face in front of him, but it had also been the day when Hao Ting saw Xi Gu in tears and realized he would never be able to grant that request.

Naturally, after some thinking, last night he had asked his friend Sun Bo whether his desire to bite Yu Xi Gu’s cute face meant that he liked him. Sun Bo Xiang, who was clearly more experienced with loving men, looked at him suspiciously, but answered sincerely that Hao Ting had to check it himself. That was why today Xiang Hao Ting was determined to speak with Yu Xi Gu.

Another thing Hao Ting had done while he was plotting revenge against his “rival in love,” was that he had learned Yu Xi Gu’s schedule in detail. Today was the day of the Royal meeting, so after it Xi Gu would attend a dinner, then he would go to his tower, and if some time was left before the dusk he might go to the library to read his clever books or write something in the notebook he sometimes carried around.

Yu Xi Gu shifted on his cushion again, and caught a glimpse of Xiang Hao Ting staring at him. He frowned and turned away, thinking how annoying the guard was. First he had thought that this guy, who had joined the palace’s guards just a year ago, was an interesting person. Whenever Xi Gu saw him, Hao Ting was shining brightly. He really stood out, especially with that unusual haircut with shaved sides and back. Other than that, he had been loud, friendly and very bold from the first day he came to the palace. He easily became the leader of a small group of friends constituting of several royal guards and even some royal family members, and Xi Gu deep in his heart admired this easygoing and authoritative personality of someone as young as him. But lately Xiang Hao Ting had become a thorn in his side, especially with that stupid trick with his clothes. Hao Ting had never properly apologized and only stared at him like a guilty dog. Xi Gu silently forgave him after a while (he had never been one to hold grudges), but he still caught Hao Ting looking at him. Xiang Hao Ting’s eyes seemed to follow him everywhere, which was rather unnerving.

The King stood up, announcing the end of the meeting, and Yu Xi Gu cursed under his breath. While thinking about the guard, he had missed the last part of the debate, when some of the most important ministers made speeches. He turned his attention to the King, thinking of a way to stealthily take some food from the dining room with him to save for breakfast.

~ ~ ~

The dinner was coming to an end, and Xiang Hao Ting, already off duty, became more and more impatient as he was waiting for Xi Gu to walk his usual path through the gallery to his tower. The guard was hiding behind one of the pillars in the gallery, listening for footsteps.

Just when he thought he should go back to his rooms, he heard light and steady tread. As it drew nearer, Hao Ting stepped out of hiding. It was in fact Yu Xi Gu, who definitely wasn’t expecting anything like that, and who, stunned, crashed into Xiang Hao Ting.

Hao Ting caught him by the arms to stop from hurting himself, and instantly forgot everything he had meant to say. Yu Xi Gu’s confused face was inches away from him, and Hao Ting instinctively tightened his grip a little bit, pulling Xi Gu closer. He really wanted to kiss Xi Gu right now.

Confusion on Xi Gu’s face grew to an obvious frustration, as he pushed Hao Ting away from him.

“What are you doing?!” he said angrily. “I’ve already told you to leave me alone! Why do you keep pestering me? Are you trying to make fun of me?”

Hao Ting was taken aback by such fiery reaction. His brain wasn’t functioning well as it was still stuck on wanting to kiss Xi Gu’s lips, so it was rather hard for him to find the right words to answer these questions.

“No,” Hao Ting said, shaking his head earnestly. “I wanted to talk to you.”

Xi Gu didn’t say anything and just watched the guard with suspicious eyes, and Hao Ting stepped closer, spouting everything that was on his mind.

“I think about you all the time,” he began.

“Huh?” Yu Xi Gu looked at him incredulously.

“I don’t know. I think about you when I walk, when I eat, when I go to bed,” Hao Ting said. “Even in my dreams I see you. I’m sorry I stole your clothes. I’m sorry if I have been a nuisance to you. But now I only want to confirm something.”

“Confirm what?”

“I will tell you afterwards.”

With that, Hao Ting stepped even closer, reached his hand out and placed it gently on Xi Gu’s cheek. He put the other hand over his heart, which was beating so fast he thought Xi Gu might hear it.

“I think I like you,” he mumbled.

“Eh?”

“I like you,” said Hao Ting, now louder, and whatever Xi Gu saw in his eyes made him blush.

In that moment Hao Ting felt elated because of the sight of that faint pink blush on Yu Xi Gu’s cheeks and his own heart beating like a hammer. He looked into Xi Gu’s wondering eyes and realized he couldn’t handle it anymore. He stepped back, bowed in the most polite way, and the next thing he knew he was running full speed to his rooms, shouting with joy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I rewatched first episodes of the series for references (because I couldn’t understand how they went from hate to love, and couldn’t really put a finger on Yu Xi Gu’s feelings), and I was shocked how different the show is from how I remembered it. I totally forgot HOW MUCH OF A CRUEL YOUNG IDIOT XIANG HAO TING HAD BEEN! I wrote him a more reasonable human being than he had been in the beginning of the series! Kinda had to rewrite some parts because of that. (^__^)’’’ I also shamelessly copy most of the moments and insert them into my story. I’m sorry for that! But that’s what I intend to do before the story changes the way I want it to.


	2. Chapter 2

Next morning Yu Xi Gu often found himself distracted from whatever he was doing, whether it was breakfast or reading, by the thoughts of what had happened the day before. His friend Lu Zhi Gang, who was in charge of the library, even jokingly poked his side when Xi Gu's thoughts wandered again. Yu Xi Gu’s startled face made him laugh a little.

“Are you dreaming with your eyes open?” Lu Zhi Gang chuckled. “Did you get enough sleep last night?” he asked after that, somewhat concerned.

“Yes, I’m alright,” his younger friend nodded solemnly.

Xi Gu then looked attentively at Lu Zhi Gang, as if he wanted to ask something, but after a while he clenched his hands and looked down at the book that was in front of him, seemingly deciding not to.

All afternoon the librarian noticed that Xi Gu stared into space with a puzzled expression. Lu Zhi Gang saw him shake his head as he tried to focus on the books, but quickly lose focus and sit with his mouth slightly open, deep in thought.

The more Yu Xi Gu thought about what the guard had said to him last night, the less sense it made. They had had so little interaction with each other that it was hard to believe there was a possibility of Xiang Hao Ting developing feelings for him. He thought that the previous incident had been resolved after he punched Hao Ting, but now he had to reconsider. The confession was either a joke or a part of some idiotic revenge plan that Xiang Hao Ting and his friends had devised, Yu Xi Gu concluded.

And yet, Xi Gu’s mind kept returning to the scene itself, to Hao Ting’s earnest expression and tone of voice, and a shadow of a doubt entered his thoughts. He could feel a little blush creeping up his neck and face as he remembered the words the guard had said. Xi Gu had never thought someone would confess to him. He secretly enjoyed this excitement, savoring its every moment.

Those emotions were baffling, and he felt that if Hao Ting had been sincere, and he gave him a chance, Xiang Hao Ting could turn Yu Xi Gu’s life around, and Xi Gu didn’t know how he felt about that.

~ ~ ~

When Yu Xi Gu stepped out of the library, he noticed that the guard he had been thinking about all morning was waving at him from across the yard, smiling joyfully. Xi Gu quickly changed directions and rushed down the stone steps, pretending not to notice Xiang Hao Ting. He hoped the guard wouldn’t follow him.

Instead of return to the tower, he went to the stream where he liked to rest in the afternoon, and as he was nearing his favorite bench, Xi Gu heard the sound of feet approaching. He turned around and looked sternly at Xiang Hao Ting, who was clearly following him.

Hao Ting stopped and offered him a smile. The smile looked rather stupid. Xi Gu frowned. He didn’t know what to think. He felt like he was some small forest creature followed by a large hound, and he didn’t know how to shake the dog off.

The guard practically beamed with pride as he held out the bundle he was carrying.

“I thought that today we could have a meal together. I know that you usually spend your afternoon here, and I have a break right now. Don’t you think that’s a good idea?” said Hao Ting. He then walked up to the bench, put the bundle there and unfolded the cloth to reveal the bamboo container. Xi Gu caught a whiff of warm dough and meat, and his stomach growled. He clenched his teeth and tried his best to look resolute.

Meanwhile Hao Ting turned back to him and gestured invitingly to the bench.

“Look at yourself! One could think that the King doesn’t feed his people!” Hao Ting chuckled at his own joke, and the next moment he smiled and looked at Xi Gu with pride. “I have never pursued a man before, but I will prove to you the sincerity of my intentions,” he said, with the air of sharing a secret.

What was he doing? Xi Gu felt a wave of anger and uneasiness wash over him. Hadn’t Hao Ting already caused him so much trouble? Wasn’t Xiang Hao Ting aware that right now with these words he was rattling his world? Xi Gu wanted to run away. Why was Hao Ting pursuing him?

“What are your true intentions?” he asked. His lips were trembling. It seemed that Hao Ting didn’t see the state he was in. If anything, the guard looked cheerful and assertive.

“I think I made myself clear yesterday. I want to be with you,” he said with another smile.

“Stop joking!” Xi Gu yelled in despair.

“I’m serious,” Xiang Hao Ting insisted. He finally saw the pain in Xi Gu’s eyes and realized with bitterness that Xi Gu didn’t believe him. Now it was his turn to feel desperate.

“Please go away,” Yu Xi Gu said, looking down.

Hao Ting clenched his jaw. He stepped closer to Yu Xi Gu and grabbed his wrist, making Xi Gu look him in the eye. His voice changed to flat and toneless when he said: “I’m neither lying nor joking. I want to be your lover, believe me. I hope you will enjoy the food I’ve brought.”

He let go of Xi Gu’s hand and left without looking back.

Xi Gu stared after him as Hao Ting briskly walked away, and couldn’t fathom whether the emotion he felt at the moment was relief or regret. One thing he knew for sure was that he was overwhelmed with fear. Confession was one thing, but Hao Ting was becoming a disturbance in his quiet and steady life. Xi Gu didn’t even want to begin to figure out whether Hao Ting was actually serious, but he decided for himself that he didn’t need a relationship. He had other things to think and care about, and this man, Xiang Hao Ting, only caused trouble, so he had to leave Yu Xi Gu alone.

~ ~ ~

Stomping his feet angrily, Xiang Hao Ting entered the inner training yard that was a part of the guards’ quarters. It was empty, for now was the time of an afternoon meal. He realized that later he would have to train on an empty stomach, and groaned in frustration.

Hao Ting felt miserable and angry at himself. He felt like an idiot. With another groan Hao Ting sat on the wooden steps that during lectures also served as the seats for the guards in training.

This was the first time the person he had confessed to refused his courtship.

His parents had always taught him and his siblings that first you had to confess, then you needed to find common grounds with that person, make a good impression and probably then they’d fall for you. He thought that talking over food might be a great way to get to know each other better. Had he done something wrong? He didn’t want Xi Gu to think he was some kind of a monster.

Xiang Hao Ting sighed deeply.

He then remembered Yu Xi Gu’s face, and put his head down in his arms. Xi Gu had looked hurt. That was not the reaction he had hoped to see. He had been hoping to see a smile, at least a little one. Just a curve of those pretty lips would have been enough; just one shy glance. Hao Ting felt giddy just thinking about the possibility. A moment later he was already submerged into the fantasies about Xi Gu’s shy smile, cute face and juicy lips.

A little tap on his shoulder brought him back to reality. Hao Ting turned his head only to see his friend, prince Xia De, holding out a bundle that looked very familiar. He took it from his hands, and realized that it was, in fact, the bundle with steamed meat buns in it that he had given Yu Xi Gu earlier. Just by the weight of it he could tell that Xi Gu hadn’t touched the food.

“Where did you get that?” Hao Ting said, trying not to sound disappointed.

“I met Yu Xi Gu while taking a walk, and he asked me to hand it back to you. He also asked me if you plan to play another trick on him. Do I need to know something?” Xia De, although being the youngest twin, had always been smarter than his elder brother. He was aware of Hao Ting’s petty “attempt at revenge,” and was probably misinterpreting the situation now.

“No. And thank you,” Hao Ting said, hugging the bundle to his chest. Prince Xia De nodded and walked away, looking slightly concerned.

Hao Ting didn’t notice that.

 _“Does Yu Xi Gu hate me? Should I stop pursuing him?”_ he thought. He bit his lip and shook his head.

His heart was already yearning for Xi Gu.

 _“I want to make him smile. Just one smile from Yu Xi Gu, and I will be satisfied. After that I’ll never show my face in front of him,”_ Xiang Hao Ting promised himself, knowing full well that it was a lie.


	3. Chapter 3

“He looks at me like I’m some kind of a monster, like I will jump him the second he turns away,” Hao Ting said in an agitated whisper to Bo Xiang.

The lecture was boring; the lecturer’s monotone voice was sending half of the guards in training to sleep. Sitting in the back row, Hao Ting and his best friend were discussing their love life.

In lieu of a response to what Hao Ting had just said, Sun Bo sent his friend a look that meant, _“And you won’t?”_

Hao Ting made a discontented face. Bo Xiang tried his best not to laugh.

“I just want him to trust me,” Hao Ting said in a hushed whiny voice.

His love adviser nodded and paused for a second to think of an answer.

“Show him that you are serious. Be adamant. If you don’t impress him, why would he take an interest in you? Pursue him with all your passion, and he will fall into your embrace!” Bo Xiang told him with a proud smile.

Hao Ting’s face lit up, and he jumped to his feet. “Sun Bo, you are a genius!” he yelled. Those students who were sleeping woke up, and everyone turned their heads to him.

“Xiang Hao Ting, take your seat and don’t interfere with the lesson!” the lecturer said, even louder than Hao Ting.

“Yes, sir!” Hao Ting shouted, bowed half-jokingly, and took his seat. He was already preoccupied with a new idea.

~ ~ ~

Lu Zhi Gang looked at his younger friend with worry, but didn’t say anything. Yu Xi Gu seemed upset about something but he also didn’t want to share what it was about.

“It’s almost time for me to go home,” Lu Zhi Gang said, walking up to the boy who was reading in his favorite corner of the library now illuminated by candlelight. “Do you plan to go home tonight?”

Yu Xi Gu looked up at him and shook his head, smiling softly at his concerned friend. “If I could, I would just live here,” he said.

“You should sleep in your bed,” said the librarian. “Fine. I’ll leave you the key, and you have to return it to me first thing in the morning. You come here early every day, anyway. Don’t stay up too late, okay? You should put out the candles when you leave. And don’t forget that you have a meeting with Mr. Tang tonight!”

Xi Gu smiled at Lu Zhi Gang who acted more like his uncle than a friend. Sure, he would never tell this to the librarian as age was a really sensitive subject to this man. Lu Zhi Gang patted Xi Gu’s shoulder and, after wishing him good night, headed to his quarters.

Xiang Hao Ting watched the librarian leave without closing the entrance doors, and walked quietly inside the library. Only one corner was illuminated with soft light. He decided to sneak up on Xi Gu and set off silently around the shelves.

Yu Xi Gu was sitting on his usual bench in a niche, his back to him. Hao Ting grinned and approached him with silent steps.

“Boo!” he shouted, and Xi Gu jumped with surprise and turned his whole body towards the sound.

Xi Gu’s face went from startled to unamused the moment he realized who was in front of him.

“You don’t look very happy to see me,” Hao Ting drawled sadly, and thought of Sun Bo’s words about passion in order not to be discouraged.

Xi Gu just gave him a displeased glance, and then asked, “Why are you here?”

Hao Ting determined that the best way to impress Xi Gu, who was very educated and who really liked his books, was to use an idiom. Hao Ting himself didn’t have a comprehensive education, and it was mainly due to the fact that he hadn’t listened to any of the tutors his mother hired. But now, he had to do his best. Almost like when he had had to pass the exam to receive the training as a royal guard. Hao Ting unceremoniously plopped onto the bench that was wide enough for two and that was covered with pillows for Xi Gu by considerate Lu Zhi Gang.

“I’m head over heels for you,” Hao Ting answered, looking into Xi Gu’s eyes with confidence.

Xi Gu just mimicked the guard’s expression in a mocking way. Hao Ting, instead of feeling hurt, found Xi Gu’s scrunched up face rather cute. He smiled. This was... some progress. Xi Gu looked almost friendly. He had to keep up the momentum.

Hao Ting reached inside his uniform’s shirt and offered Xi Gu two apples he had brought with him. “I know you didn’t have a proper meal all evening. You must be hungry, so you should eat,” he said, putting the apples on the pillow between them.

“Are you spying on me?!” Xi Gu almost yelled at him in disbelief.

Hao Ting had never looked at his own behavior from this perspective. “Sure. I was told that I need to pursue the person I like with all my passion,” he began, but was interrupted by Xi Gu, who was still furious.

“What do you want?”

“I want to be with you,” Hao Ting answered in a seductive tone without missing a beat. Xi Gu rolled his eyes.

“This will never happen,” Xi Gu hissed and demonstratively returned to the book. Hao Ting grew irritated.

“You know, this isn’t very polite! I came here to talk, and you ignore me.” He grabbed onto the book and tried to pull it away from Xi Gu’s hands, but Xi Gu with his fast reaction managed to hide it behind his back.

The look in Xi Gu’s eyes was almost hostile. He looked tense and defensive. This, again, was not the reaction Hao Ting had been hoping for. He realized his mistake and knew he had to begin anew. He sighed.

“I’m sorry. I was harsh. But you don’t even try to be nice to me, and it’s upsetting! But I’m trying to be nice, I brought you apples,” he said in a placating and slightly whiny voice, pushing the apples towards his love interest. The tension visibly left Xi Gu, and now he just looked annoyed. Hao Ting decided to push his luck just a little and said, “These apples are really good. It would be a waste if no one eats them.”

Xi Gu looked at the apples, contemplative, but shook his head and met Hao Ting’s eyes unwaveringly.

“You can think of them as an apology gift from me,” Hao Ting added. Now it was a matter of principle to make Xi Gu taste the food he had brought.

Xi Gu glanced at the apples again, then at Hao Ting; and when he looked at Hao Ting, he frowned, snorted, and turned his head to the side so the apples were not in his line of vision.

“Go away.”

To Hao Ting this defiant Yu Xi Gu looked delicious. It was almost like they were both playing a little game. He licked his lips, and his gaze trailed down to Xi Gu’s lips. His prey, it seemed, sensed the danger he was in and tried to get up. But this time Hao Ting was faster. In one swift movement he pressed his upper body into Xi Gu’s, and caught him by the wrists.

Xi Gu belatedly realized that he dealt with a huge carnivore who acted on instincts. A moment later he was pressed into the corner of the niche. He felt heat bloom in his cheeks. Hao Ting’s face was too close to his. He could see his own reflection in the other’s eyes.

Hao Ting felt triumphant. His loud voice reverberated in the silence of the library. “You are not trying to escape. Maybe you actually want to be kissed by me? Apples or a kiss. Choose one!”

Xi Gu tried to push him away, but Hao Ting was heavy like a rock. Xi Gu knew he had little choice.

“Apples or a kiss. Choose one!” Hao Ting repeated, now looking at Xi Gu’s lips with a hungry glint in his eyes.

“Alright, apples! I choose apples!” Xi Gu cried out, accepting defeat. This was a heavy blow to his pride. He had actually lost to this crazy guard. And he was trying so hard to stay adamant!

Hao Ting released his hold on Xi Gu’s arms and sat properly at his side of the bench, fixing his clothes. He could barely hide his smug smile. This time he wasn’t playing fair, but it was worth it. Now he allowed himself to hope that the next time he brought food Xi Gu would share a meal with him without making so much fuss. Also, when Xi Gu was flustered, he was very pretty. Hao Ting couldn’t take his eyes off of him.

Xi Gu reluctantly took one of the apples from the bench and met Hao Ting’s eyes. The guard smiled, and to Xi Gu this smile was probably the most annoying thing he had seen his whole life. Hao Ting was insufferable.


	4. Chapter 4

“Why are you walking so fast? You don’t like me this much?” Hao Ting was rather out of breath in trying to keep up with Yu Xi Gu. “Usually in the evening you take a stroll and enjoy the trees near the tower!”

Xi Gu walked in front of him without looking at the guard or even turning his head until they reached the tower. He stopped at the bottom of the stairs and wheeled around. Even in semidarkness Hao Ting could see that Xi Gu was looking at him with the same defiant face, with his chin lifted, and not willing to say a word. Xiang Hao Ting felt sad, but he was a stubborn young man as well.

“See you in the morning, then,” he said with a somewhat hopeful intonation. “I will bring us breakfast.”

“No, in the morning I have something to do,” Xi Gu answered instantly.

“Then I will pick you up from the library, at lunchtime,” Hao Ting continued. “I will try to bring you peaches.”

It looked like Xi Gu meant to give him another excuse, but was too tired to argue. “Okay. Bye,” without another word, he run up the stairs and disappeared from the guard’s view as the staircase turned a corner.

Hao Ting stood there with his eyes wide open. He couldn’t believe his luck. “Yes!” he whispered and broke into a wide smile. A happy unintelligible sound escaped from his lips. Trying not to make much noise, Hao Ting jumped and danced, basking in the happiness of the moment.

He hummed a happy song as he walked back to his rooms through the gallery, and hugged the pillars and danced with them, as if they were his dance partners. Halfway through the passage, he stopped and turned around to take a dreamy look back at the tower.

Hao Ting froze on the spot because he saw Yu Xi Gu walk down the stairs looking through the pouch that was hanging on his shoulder. To Hao Ting’ surprise, he wasn’t dressed in his usual courtly white robes anymore, now he had something different and more casual on. Xi Gu looked almost like a trader. Hao Ting grew tense. Xi Gu said he had something to do in the morning, then why didn’t he go to sleep? And why hadn’t he seen Xi Gu go out at this hour when he was “investigating” him before?

Unconsciously, Hao Ting moved into the shadow behind one of the pillars, and then followed Yu Xi Gu, who quickly walked across the main courtyard and came out of the royal palace through the central gates and into the busy main street of the city below.

~ ~ ~

Xi Gu was walking fast, clenching his fists until the knuckles turned white so he didn’t feel nervous. He had always been awkward with new people, but the person he had a meeting with was not just a regular client. Plus his request was also something out of the ordinary.

Lu Zhi Gang had told him that this person was not as scary as everyone said he was, but Xi Gu just couldn’t believe this. By all accounts, Mr. Tang was very powerful, as he even came to some of the King’s meetings although he had no known connections to any clan or ministry. The man was nearly a gang leader, if the rumors were true.

Xi Gu’s grip on the strap of his pouch grew tighter as he was nearing Mr. Tang’s shop. He didn’t even need to ask for directions to find the place, because it was the most elegant shop in the main street with little stained glass windows. Two green lanterns with intricate design illuminated the entrance.

He hesitated a bit before stepping in, and what Xi Gu found inside took his breath away. The inside of the shop looked just as extravagant and magical as the exterior. Dozens of lanterns illuminated the room with their soft yellow light. It was spacious, and the shop was clearly divided into the area for the clients, where Xi Gu could see rows of shelves with expensive fabrics, some ready-made garments, changing rooms, and two shopkeepers who stood at attention ready to serve the clients; and into the area for the owner on the left that was hidden behind a wooden partition wall. There was a large and expensive-looking table surrounded with three soft seats. Xi Gu looked around with his mouth open.

“Welcome to my shop. You are young Mr. Yu, Lu Zhi Gang’s friend, am I correct?” said a pleasant but hard voice from behind the wooden partition wall.

Xi Gu came up to the table and noticed a tall man stand up from the seat in the shadow to greet him.

Xi Gu bowed in the most polite way (mostly out of fear that this man inspired in him) and answered, “Yes. I’m Yu Xi Gu, at your service.”

He couldn’t bring himself to fully raise his head and look at the man’s face. All he noticed was that the way Mr. Tang dressed was befitting an owner of a tailor shop. His robes were made of some very fine material and had a nice deep dark blue color to them. Xi Gu also noticed that the man’s throat was covered with a high-necked knitted piece that he wore beneath the robes. It was rather odd to wear warm clothes in summertime. But still, the man’s figure was imposing and his presence was overwhelming. Xi Gu thought that probably the rumors about Mr. Tang being a gang leader were not just rumors.

“Please, take a seat,” the same voice said, and in his line of vision Xi Gu only saw a hand gesturing him to take a seat, as he was still too afraid to raise his head.

Xi Gu sat down hurriedly, and fetched the notebook from the pouch he placed beside him. The simple feeling of the notebook’s leather cover on his fingertips helped him feel less nervous. _“Act professional,”_ Xi Gu thought to himself.

“Lu Zhi Gang had mentioned that you would like to order a star chart reading?” he inquired as he rubbed his nose to conceal his nervousness. It seemed that Mr. Tang was either too accustomed to people being afraid to look him in the eye or was too polite to point out Xi Gu’s unmannerly ways.

“Actually, I would like to order three readings. From our common friend I’ve heard that you are the only son and successor of the royal stargazer. And that you’ve picked up your late father’s work. My father had often turned to your father for advice.”

Xi Gu’s heart began to beat more quickly. His first real order was three charts at once! It caused excitement and dread at the same time. Besides, Tang Yi’s father had been an acquaintance of his father... Xi Gu wanted to learn more, but was too afraid to ask questions.

“I would like to order three star chart readings,” Mr. Tang repeated to clarify, “because the introduction of my lover to my only family member has caused some tension in our relationships. I would like to know how our fortunes interact with each other, and whether these petty fights will ever stop.” His voice trembled, revealing Tang Yi’s annoyance.

“Yes, that’s possible,” Xi Gu said. The more agitated and angry Mr. Tang was, thinking of his loved ones’ quarrels, the more nervous Xi Gu grew. He also somewhat felt like a liar. Before he had only told fortunes of his friend Lu Zhi Gang and also of some of the librarian’s female friends from the palace. Now his client was a very influential man, and Xi Gu felt a lot of pressure.

“Good. Should I tell you the names and birth dates?”

“Only birth dates, please.”

Mr. Tang offered him a piece of paper with three dates, and Xi Gu carefully copied them down into his notebook.

“Would you like to have some tea? It was impolite of me not to offer it sooner,” Mr. Tang asked in the meantime. After Xi Gu’s shaky “Yes” he gestured to one of the shopkeepers, and less than a minute later two cups and a teapot appeared in front of them. Light jasmine scent that emanated from his cup barely had any calming effect on Xi Gu’s nerves.

Hao Ting peeked inside the tailor shop, but couldn’t see Xi Gu. He had kept a safe distance when he followed Yu Xi Gu, so he arrived at the shop significantly later.

He had heard certain rumors about the owner of this shop, mostly from Sun Bo, who at one point had been obsessed with this man. According to Sun Bo, the shop owner was exceptionally handsome, had a prominent position in the Royal court due to his wealth, and was rumored to have both men and women as his lovers.

Hao Ting knew he looked suspicious because it was rather late and he was loitering by the shop’s entrance in his Royal guard’s uniform, and now he really felt like he had to go back empty-handed.

He almost turned to leave, when he heard a voice. “May I help you?”

A short woman with a polite and welcoming smile stood at the entrance of the shop. Hao Ting panicked and nodded, then said, “Yes. I would like to get a new dress for my mother. It shall be a gift.”

This was the first thing he could think of, and when the words left his mouth he realized his story sounded rather silly. Anyway, now he had to keep up this lie.

“Please, come in,” the shopkeeper said, stepping back in and seemingly expecting him to follow.

When he entered the shop, Hao Ting looked around and immediately spotted Xi Gu sitting at a table with a very handsome man. Hao Ting hated this man — clearly the owner of the shop — the moment he saw him. Despite the owner’s pleasant and intelligent face, there was something intimidating about his demeanor.

The shopkeeper started to talk in detail about the fabrics, the price and the possible timelines, and Hao Ting nodded as if he was listening, but in reality all his attention was focused on Xi Gu and the man in the corner.

Even from his back Hao Ting could tell that Xi Gu was tense. He didn’t raise his head and generally seemed rather jittery. Was that man pressuring Xi Gu into agreeing to something?

Xi Gu hid the notebook into his pouch and stood up to leave when the man stood up as well.

Xi Gu flinched slightly, and in that instant Hao Ting knew that he could not stand seeing Xi Gu’s distress. He was struck with a sudden urge to save the scared little thing. With rapid strides he walked towards Xi Gu and the shop owner, picking up their conversation as he moved closer to them.

“I hope my request is not excessive,” the owner said to Xi Gu. “You know, this may be the beginning of a very fruitful relationship. I was also told that you are in a desperate need for money. I’m establishing a tea house in memory of the man who was my father.”

Tang Yi took a step toward Xi Gu, studying his face closely. Xi Gu still looked pointedly to the floor, his whole body shaking a little.

“I think I can offer you a position there. You are rather good-looking. We can give you a proper uniform, and also a friend of mine can provide you with some adornments; to enhance the looks, so to say. Then you will be popular with the clients. I have to tell you that this headdress of yours is clearly out of fashion.” Mr. Tang, with a deep thrown on his face, reached out to touch the cap. Xi Gu stepped back. Hao Ting saw red.

“What are you doing?!”

Xi Gu suddenly heard a familiar voice, and next thing he knew, Xiang Hao Ting emerged from behind his back and threw a punch at Mr. Tang.

He finally saw the shop owner’s face, which now expressed a great amount of shock. Then, being pulled away by Xiang Hao Ting, Xi Gu also noticed a radiant smile of another man who seemingly had just come inside from the street and who was about to laugh at Mr. Tang’s misery. This other man was either very brave or very foolish, to laugh at such a scary man.

Everything seemed surreal. For a second there, when he had heard a familiar voice, Xi Gu felt relieved. Now, thinking about it, he berated himself, as Mr. Tang clearly hadn’t done anything to deserve this.

The reality hit Xi Gu when Hao Ting finally let go of his arm, and he found himself in a quiet alley away from the busy main street, yet, it seemed, still not that far away from Mr. Tang’s shop.

He looked at Hao Ting in silence, and thought how again, this fool had caused him trouble, but this time it was something really big. What had he done? Xi Gu could not imagine how he would apologize to Tang Yi now. The awfulness of the situation caused his eyes to fill with tears.

“What were you doing there?” Hao Ting suddenly yelled. He didn’t seem angry, more desperate and sad. “What did this man ask you to do? If you need money, I will give you money! You don’t have to do what you don’t like!”

Xi Gu met the guard’s eyes and thought how Hao Ting’s world was very different from the one he lived in. Xi Gu pushed Hao Ting’s chest with both hands in a hopeless angry gesture.

“Stop it!” he pleaded. “Haven’t you had enough? Please, just leave me alone. I don’t want to play your games. You have already made my life miserable. I will do anything you want, anything you ask of me, you can even beat me if you want...”

Xi Gu dropped to his knees. Hao Ting’s eyes grew big, and he watched him, uncomprehending. He couldn’t understand how Xi Gu could give up his pride and stand on his knees so easily. He couldn’t imagine himself or any of his friends do the same to protect what was important to them. In his mind, Xi Gu was really admirable.

“I’m different from you,” Xi Gu continued, now crying, his tears flowing freely. “I have to study to keep living in the palace. I have to work to afford to stay there. Yes, it’s not always enjoyable, but I have to make money. Now I’ve lost a client, and I don’t know if I can possibly make some amends to Mr. Tang for what you have just done. Xiang Hao Ting, I’m begging you to just leave me be!”

Slowly, Xi Gu’s words started to sink in, and Hao Ting began to realize how little he knew about the person he liked. _“Why does Xi Gu have to work? Isn’t he living in the palace already? Doesn’t he belong to the nobility?”_ he thought while looking in shocked surprise at Xi Gu, who still stood on his knees in front of him with tears in his big beautiful eyes. If that was the truth, then Hao Ting had done something terrible. His head began to spin.

“I’m sorry. I think I need to leave,” he mumbled, not really understanding himself what he was saying. And with that he left the alley.


	5. Chapter 5

Hao Ting walked somewhere, aimlessly. He had so much to think about.

His legs had taken him to his parents’ residence, and he didn’t notice that the servant who opened the gates for him gave him an odd look when Hao Ting didn’t answer the greeting.

Hao Ting was sitting on a bench in his mother’s dimly lit garden — that smelled of his mother’s favorite violet late summer flowers — when he heard a soft voice say, “Brother?” He felt like he had finally woken up from his dark thoughts when he saw his sister walk up to him in her leisure dress.

“Are you crying, brother?” Yong Qing asked.

Hao Ting touched his cheeks with his thumbs and found them streaked with tears. He wiped them dry with the sleeves of his uniform’s shirt.

“Tell me, Xiang Yong Qing, am I a selfish brat?” Hao Ting asked gloomily, vocalizing his thoughts.

“You finally noticed it?” his sister said with a good-natured smile. Hao Ting’s shoulders dropped.

“Have I always been a bad person? Father always says I’m being self-centered and ungrateful; instructors yell at me for being disruptive and undisciplined; even Bo Xiang thinks I do whatever I want without thinking about consequences! I have hurt so many,” he added in a small voice and looked down. _“I have hurt Xi Gu,”_ he thought to himself.

Yong Qing looked at her brother in surprise. There was no trace of his usual lively self. Right now he was as lifeless as a ghoul. She sat down next to him and put her hand on his arm, trying to comfort him. “You are not that bad. Sometimes you can be selfish and insolent, that is true. This is who you are. But you have a very kind heart.”

“Me?” Hao Ting asked, unsure. He thought about Xi Gu looking at him with a painful look in his face, and again hung his head in remorse.

“Yes, you!” Yong Qing answered fervently. “You are so kind and good at taking care of other people; your friends, for example! That’s why they like you so much. You’re also such a good brother to me. I am very proud of you, you know.”

“Really?” asked Hao Ting, and there was hope in his voice. He finally turned his head to look at his sister, and Yong Qing saw him smile a little. She knew she had to be honest now, even if later she would feel ashamed about being so truthful with her brother.

“Do you remember when our eldest brother eloped with his fiancée, and you said that now we had to be mother and father’s joy? And that you would take the exam and become a royal guard, to make them proud? You were really cool that time! I even boasted about it to my friends, when you passed the exam.”

“Really?” Hao Ting repeated, smiling wide. Yong Qing nodded and patted his arm.

“Yes. Don’t worry about such things, you are a good person. Now you know that you have a potential for growth. Some people don’t even have that. You just sometimes need to be more caring and serious. Then you’d be almost perfect.”

“More caring and serious?” echoed Hao Ting, again thinking about Xi Gu. Yes, this could be the answer. “Xiang Yong Qing, you are such a darling!” he said and kissed her forehead, overcome with brotherly affection. His sister laughed at him because he was being her silly elder brother again.

“Just don’t walk around holding your nose up,” she said, grinning, and nudged him with an elbow.

He tried to hug her again, but she pushed him away, knowing Hao Ting turned into a giant dog when he became affectionate. She then looked at him seriously and said: “Shouldn’t you already be in your quarters?”

Hao Ting’s eyes grew big. “I totally forgot about tonight’s duty!” he yelled and jumped to his feet. Yong Qing shook her head a little.

“Tell mother and father I say I love them. Within the next two weeks I will come visit them and stay here when I’m off-duty. I want to eat all my favorite food! Don’t forget to tell them. Bye!” He shouted to her, already half-way through the garden and to the gates. He waved at her and run, hoping his superiors wouldn’t notice his absence or that his friends would come up with a plausible excuse for it.

~ ~ ~

Next day, during his afternoon break — after completing all his morning tasks and taking his punishment for being awfully late the day before, — Xiang Hao Ting went to look for prince Xia De. The prince seemed to know Xi Gu personally because Hao Ting had seen them conversing a few times. The guard thought that probably from him he could get some answers to the questions that had kept him awake that night.

Hao Ting found the prince resting by the stream in the company of his twin. The brothers seemed to have just finished their morning training, judging by their tired faces, tousled hair, and their clothes that were more fit for battle than for the Royal palace.

“Hao Ting!” they greeted him in unison. After a little chat about nothing, the guard finally decided to bring up the topic he was interested in.

“Xia De, can you please tell me as much as you can about Yu Xi Gu?” he pleaded. The prince grew visibly tense.

“What, are you still looking for payback with him?” Prince Xia En butted in, surprised.

“Are you?” Prince Xia De echoed, eyeing Hao Ting suspiciously.

Before the guard could answer, the elder twin added, “I will support you. He’s walking the palace grounds looking all prim and clever, and the girls like him so much! When he started telling fortunes, they all fell madly in love with him. I will support you, my friend. We need to teach him a lesson.”

“No!” Hao Ting said, shaking his head violently as if he was trying to shake off this ridiculous idea. “No, no, no, no, no. It’s not about revenge or anything like that. I just want to know more about him.”

“Isn’t it better to ask Yu Xi Gu any questions that you have about him?” Prince Xia De asked carefully. Hao Ting thought that the younger prince was probably right.

“Would Hao Ting go to you with his questions if he could just ask that guy in person? Come on, ask me any questions you have, I probably know as much as my brother!” Xia En said confidently. Xia De tried to object, but his brother waved him to silence.

“For example, is Yu Xi Gu a nobleman?” Hao Ting asked the first question that came to mind.

“Yes and no, it’s a long story. Do you have some time?”

“Sure,” said Hao Ting and sat down on the ground next to the brothers, deciding that this information was more important than having lunch, anyway.

Xia En did know a lot, and Xia De also joined the conversation to add what he knew, somewhat reluctantly.

Hao Ting had learned that Xi Gu was the only son of the Royal stargazer and the late Queen’s first maid. Xi Gu’s mother was from a noble family and was less of a maid and more of a confidante to the Queen as the two had been friends since childhood. Xi Gu’s father was initially a servant at the palace who gained status and respect when he first became an apprentice to the Royal stargazer — thanks to his passionate interest in stars — and then himself became one when his teacher passed away. His predictions were very precise, and even the King listened to his advice. Prince Xia En insisted that the stargazer had charmed the Queen’s first maid with his “twaddle” about stars the same way Xi Gu now charmed the girls at the palace. Xia De got mad at his brother and told him that he was talking nonsense, so Xia De continued the story himself.

According to him, Xi Gu’s mother’s side of the family disapproved of the marriage, and disowned her. She seemed not to be very affected by that as she was happy in her marriage, continued to be a good friend to the Queen, and her husband had a good position in the palace, receiving quite a generous allowance from the King. The couple moved into the stargazer’s tower, had a son.

“They died the same year as our Royal mother, from an unknown disease. After that Yu Xi Gu was raised by his aunt. Now, I think, he wishes to succeed his father’s position,” Xia De concluded.

“No, I’m telling you, he’s taken an interest in this star stuff only to impress girls!” Xia En interrupted him, waving his finger in front of his brother’s eyes. He seemed to believe what he was saying.

“I haven’t really seen him talk to any girl,” Hao Ting said without thinking. He really hadn’t. From what Hao Ting had gathered, Xi Gu spent his days mainly in the library, and didn’t talk to many people except for his friend, the librarian.

“Your former sweetheart is one of those many who fell for him!” Xia En argued hotly. “He isn’t even that attractive, but girls can leave you mid-conversation just to go look at him when he’s walking around all haughty! They think he’s pretty!”

“Well, they are right,” Hao Ting nodded, and then realized what he had just said.

“What?” the twins asked in unison, but with different emotions. Xia En sounded incredulous, but Xia De seemed genuinely surprised.

Hao Ting grinned as he didn’t know what to do. He giggled and added tentatively, “Don’t you think so?”

Xia En and Xia De exchanged puzzled looks and then both turned to look at Hao Ting with identical curious expressions on their faces.

“Is there anything you want to tell us?” Xia En inquired.

“No. Not really! I need to go!” yelled Hao Ting, helplessly pointing behind his back. He jumped to his feet, thanked the twins for their input, and almost run back to the guards’ training quarters under their amused gaze.

~ ~ ~

Late in the evening, at the end of his watch, with a heavy heart Hao Ting went to look for Yu Xi Gu in the library. He knew he had to speak to him, even if that meant Xi Gu wouldn’t say another word to him.

Hao Ting checked all the rows of bookshelves but didn’t find Xi Gu anywhere, and was about to leave when the librarian stepped over and blocked his way to the door.

“Would you mind helping me with those books?” he said in a voice that made it clear Hao Ting had no choice but to agree.

Lu Zhi Gang really made him arrange two bookshelves, as Hao Ting was too afraid to object. When he finished, they were alone in the library. Now they could talk without being overheard.

“You wanted to discuss something?” Hao Ting asked, still a little bit scared. Usually the librarian seemed like a very gentle man, but now with his arms folded he looked big and intimidating.

“I believe you are the guard who pursues Xi Gu,” Lu Zhi Gang began, going straight to the point.

“Yes,” Hao Ting admitted, looking right into Xi Gu’s friend’s eyes and instinctively trying to act serious and mature. “How do you know?”

“I saw you yesterday. I was taking a walk as I couldn’t sleep, and saw you follow Xi Gu to the tower.”

“Yes, I accompanied him home,” Hao Ting lied. It wasn’t even a lie — it just depended on the way you looked at it.

“He didn’t seem very happy about that,” Lu Zhi Gang pointed out. It was clear he didn’t share Hao Ting’s point of view. The guard tried to breathe deeply to stay calm.

“And then I learn,” Lu Zhi Gang continued, his voice shaking with anger, “that someone punched Xi Gu’s client, my good friend Tang Yi.”

“That was also me,” Hao Ting admitted, knowing there was no reason to deny it. For the first time in what felt like years he was truly ashamed.

The librarian gasped. Now he was furious.

“Do you know that Xi Gu has to work to continue living in the palace? Now he’s lost a client. He’s devastated!”

“Yes, I know that,” the guard answered in a small voice.

“Then you also know that he’s a very timid person who probably hasn’t had a relationship yet; and that he has to study and work, and thus certainly has no time to play your games! Then why are you here, looking for him?” Lu Zhi Gang asked wrathfully.

Hao Ting flinched and frowned, irked by what this man was saying, but he knew now was not the time to be childish, lose patience and run away without explaining things to the person who seemed to care a lot about Xi Gu.

“I came to say sorry. Also, I came to tell him not to worry about that scary shop owner, because I have settled it,” Hao Ting said firmly. He stood right, just like he did when he was on his duty as a guard.

“What?” Lu Zhi Gang stepped back, dazed and blinking a lot, as if he couldn’t understand or believe what the other was saying. “How?”

“Let’s just say my mother will receive a very expensive gift, and I will pay for it,” Hao Ting said with a wry annoyed smile. And yet he passed his hand over his hair in a habitual gesture that meant he was a little proud of himself.

The librarian raised his eyebrows as he took the hint. “Oh,” he mumbled, visibly losing his anger and once again becoming the small gentle man he was.

Hao Ting took a quick calculating glimpse at Xi Gu’s friend. He suddenly realized that this was a good opportunity for him to ask questions.

“You’ve mentioned that Xi Gu has to work. Does he do something... illegal?”

It was hard for him to say what he wanted to ask, because what he had seen at the tailor shop still made his heart ache.

“What? Of course not!” Lu Zhi Gang frowned and said dismissively. Hao Ting was relieved. He had been really worried for Yu Xi Gu these 24 hours.

The librarian continued: “He tells fortune based on the movement of stars. Besides that, he writes or rewrites personal letters for some clients when they doubt their ability to be concise or when they have bad handwriting or poor spelling.”

Hao Ting nodded and pried further: “He said he doesn’t always like his work. Why does he have to work in the first place? Doesn’t he get paid allowance, like his parents once had? And doesn’t he have an aunt who supports him?”

Lu Zhi Gang looked at Hao Ting, and his eyes held a silent question, _“You know a lot, don’t you?”_ But he still answered.

“He is just a kid whose existence was almost forgotten, and the financial support he gets has dwindled over the years. He lives in the stargazer’s tower, and there has been a rumor that some influential people are interested in it. It is the tallest tower, and with a nice view. The position of the Royal stargazer is vacant, and with age the King relies less on the stars and more on the opinion of his council and the voice of reason. Xi Gu has the same interest in stars as his father once had. With enough knowledge he might become an even better stargazer than his father. He hopes he might both get the position and defend his right to stay in the tower. You should understand that he really needs to study.

“As for Xi Gu’s aunt, she got married last year and moved with her husband to another region. She sends him money, but not much. She doesn’t have much money herself.”

Hao Ting stood there, listening to Lu Zhi Gang, and felt sad and sorry. Yu Xi Gu’s life was very different from Xiang Hao Ting’s easy life. He just wished for Xi Gu to be happy. He really, really needed to apologize.

“Mr. Lu, thank you. I am very thankful that I’ve learned all this from a person who knows Yu Xi Gu so well,” he bowed with a candid boldness that impressed the librarian. “Please do not tell Xi Gu I’ve been looking for him. I would like to speak to him in person.”

“You are welcome,” Lu Zhi Gang said, not knowing what else to say.

“And also, please don’t tell him how I gained Mr. Tang’s forgiveness. I don’t want Xi Gu to know that. No, you know, don’t even tell him it was me who has settled it. Tell him it was you,” Hao Ting said with a mysterious smile. The guard then bowed again, politely excused himself and left.

Lu Zhi Gang scratched his head. He didn’t understand this young man at all.

~ ~ ~

That night Hao Ting laid in his bed in the guards’ quarters, staring at the ceiling. He was tossing up and catching again a little bag filled with sand, while he thought about what he had learned that day.

His friend Sun Bo occupied the nearest bed. He couldn’t fall asleep and was tossing and turning as he tried to find a better sleeping position. Two other beds were vacant; their owners were on night duty.

“Hey, Hao Ting! Are you asleep?” whispered Bo Xiang, finally having given up on trying to sleep.

“No,” Hao Ting answered and put the little bag on the floor near his bed. He turned on his side to face Sun Bo, his head leant on his hand, although he couldn’t see him in the darkness.

“What are you thinking about?” his friend said.

“Yu Xi Gu.”

“You are still thinking about him? You must be madly in love with him!” Bo Xiang grinned widely.

“I am,” Hao Ting said sluggishly and wailed a little. He was, yet he hadn’t been able to prove his sincerity to the person he liked.

“What?” said Bo Xiang, somewhat taken aback. He jumped up in bed.“For real? Even though he’s all... _clever?_ ”

Hao Ting was annoyed. “So what? I’m clever, too!”

“Yeah,” his friend laughed again. Then he asked with genuine interest, “What do you like about him?”

“He’s perfect,” Hao Ting answered with feeling. Sun Bo chuckled. Hao Ting jumped up in the bed as well.

“Hey, Sun Bo Xiang!” he yelled, pointing his finger at Bo Xiang in an accusatory gesture. “What kind of a friend do you think you are if you just laugh at your friend’s feelings? Don’t question my love for Xi Gu!”

“So he’s perfect?” Bo Xiang asked in an amused voice. He sounded friendly, so Hao Ting let it pass.

“He is. Also he’s very cute,” Hao Ting added contentedly. He laid back down and folded his hands over his stomach once again. He remembered that time when he had found Yu Xi Gu sleeping peacefully on the bench near the stream. That time Xi Gu’s beautiful sleeping face took his breath away.

“So, did you tell him that?” his friend asked.

“Not yet. Tomorrow,” Hao Ting answered softly, as if trying not to jinx it.

“Good,” Sun Bo said and paused. “You know, first I thought you were joking when you said that you liked him. After all, you’ve never mentioned you liked men before. Now I see that you’re serious about him. I’m happy for you. Good luck.”

“Thank you,” Hao Ting said meaningfully. He went to sleep with renewed hope in his heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Just Tang Yi coercing people to buy his shop’s clothes. xD]


	6. Chapter 6

Hao Ting finally got a chance to speak to Yu Xi Gu during his afternoon break. When Xi Gu saw him standing at the entrance to the gallery near stargazer’s tower, he stopped short and shook his head without emotion. It was as if Xi Gu was saying, _“No, not you.”_

Hao Ting’s heart sank. It required all of his willpower to take some twenty steps towards Xi Gu.

“Can we speak privately? I need a chance to explain,” said the guard in a small voice.

Xi Gu met his eyes — that had the same expression as a guilty dog’s eyes — and nodded after a brief pause, when he studied Hao Ting’s face carefully. “Okay. Follow me,” he said.

He slowly walked back to his tower, aware of the constant presence of Hao Ting walking obediently behind him.

Xi Gu tried to shake off the uneasy feeling he had in his chest. The other day he had reacted in an overly dramatic fashion and caused a scene, told Hao Ting some unnecessary things, even fell down to his knees; now he was ashamed. And to top it off, Lu Zhi Gang said that he had asked Tang Yi to forgive Xi Gu and Hao Ting, and everything was settled now. The situation had turned out to be less drastic than Xi Gu imagined. But what worried Xi Gu the most was that he still couldn’t quite put his finger on the guard’s reaction that night. Did Hao Ting pity him now? Will the guard apologize and tell him that everything had been a joke to make Yu Xi Gu look like a fool? Xi Gu’s shoulders dropped at the thought. Anyway, he wanted to put an end to this situation so he had to listen to what Hao Ting wanted to tell him.

They walked up the stairs, and for the first time Hao Ting noticed that Xi Gu didn’t enter the main doors, which remained closed, but chose to open a small unremarkable door located to the right and some distance from the ornate tower entrance doors.

Xi Gu turned the key and opened the small door. He removed his shoes and grabbed them in both hands, holding them to his chest in an unconscious awkward and somewhat protective gesture.

“Come in,” he said, glancing at Hao Ting sheepishly.

This was the first time Yu Xi Gu had someone outside his family and friends in his quarters. He looked at his room through Hao Ting’s eyes, imagining how it must look to him.

“Ah, yes.”

Hao Ting flinched, startled, as he had been in a daze all these past couple of minutes. Nothing felt real in this moment. He was about to step into Xi Gu’s rooms. It was more than he could have ever hoped for.

He took off his shoes quickly. “Where do I put them?”

“Here,” Xi Gu pointed to the corner behind the door, where he had just put his own pair, and then he took a few more steps into the room, so that there would be enough space to accommodate them both. He placed his pouch down near his bed and suddenly realized how small his room was. How close Hao Ting stood to him.

“Would you like some water?” he asked as he nervously fetched a cup and a jar from a low table that stood beside his bed.

“Oh? No. No, thank you,” Hao Ting said. He was busy looking about him, taking in every detail of the room, and stealing glances at Xi Gu, trying to fit him in this room and imagine how he lived his day-to-day life.

“Ah, alright,” mumbled Xi Gu, swiftly filled the cup and emptied it in a couple of big nervous gulps.

First thing Hao Ting noticed was that the room was very tidy. It had only one window that let in the light, and there was a second door that led somewhere. There weren’t many things in the room, only a bed against the wall and a low table beside it, a wardrobe, and a wooden box with several holes in the lid — the latter right by Hao Ting’s feet, placed on a stack of books and papers. Actually, there were lots of books and papers laying here and there, and small trinkets were a finishing touch to the simple interior of the room.

Xi Gu tilted his head to the side and spoke again, sounding uncertain: “So, you?..” but was interrupted by Hao Ting, who came to his senses and suddenly took a step closer.

“I would like to explain myself,” the guard said hurriedly. Hao Ting looked into Xi Gu’s wondering eyes, and his words poured out on their own. “I want to apologize to you for that time I stole your clothes in the bathhouse. I could not have imagined it would end the way it did. I really, really wanted to apologize this whole time, but never found the right moment... It was never my intention to hurt you. I also apologize for punching your client... I didn’t mean to interfere with your work! It was just that it was really late, and you were very tense, and he wanted to touch you, and he said that you needed money...”

Hao Ting was speaking with growing fervor, but now he winced and fell silent. Xi Gu was gripped by a pang of sadness. He felt like after this apology it was about time for Hao Ting to tell him that everything else had been a cruel joke.

“Actually, I was told that...” Xi Gu began, trying to explain that everything was alright as Lu Zhi Gang had apologized for them.

“I want to say that I really like you,” Hao Ting blurted out, his face earnest.

He took another step forward and kissed Xi Gu tenderly.

Xi Gu blinked a few times, shocked. His heart fluttered like the wings of a small startled bird. Gentle caress of Hao Ting’s lips made him tremble, and he closed his eyes, succumbing to the pleasant feeling coursing through his body.

Hao Ting moved his mouth a little, enjoying the soft warmth of Xi Gu’s lips and of the little breath Xi Gu let out. Then he pulled away, almost with regret, and felt how for a brief moment Xi Gu followed the movement of his head, as if he didn’t want the kiss to end.

When the kiss ended they both opened their eyes and looked at each other, their chests heaving. Hao Ting felt little lightning bolts continue running through his body, and the intensity of these emotions frightened him.

Seeing Hao Ting regard him with such a strong feeling, Xi Gu gasped and, wide-eyed, stepped back.

They both gulped, and Hao Ting bit his lower lip, not knowing what to say. The mixture of happiness and fear made his mind go blank. He stared at Xi Gu, awaiting his sentence.

And Xi Gu realized that Hao Ting’s fate was now in his hands. He looked down, perplexed, and tried to listen to his heart to find the answer. His fingers fumbled with the white fabric of his robes’ long sleeves. A moment later Xi Gu looked back at Hao Ting.

“I don’t really like men,” he said softly. It was an awkward and honest answer.

But secretly he thought to himself that he had never experienced any such feelings towards women, either. These past two or three years he had been so preoccupied with his studies and now work that he had never had a chance to spend enough time in someone’s company to even begin considering a relationship.

“I’ve never liked men before, either,” Hao Ting confessed and quickly added with fervor: “But I want to assure you that I like you. I’m serious.”

He didn’t want to leave anything unsaid.

Xi Gu didn’t say a word, but frowned a little. He was clearly agitated, and his eyes that expressed his utter distraught didn’t even seem to blink as he looked at the guard.

“I hope you believe me,” Hao Ting said as calmly as he could. “See you tomorrow.”

He took his shoes and walked out. The moment he closed the door behind him, his emotions overwhelmed him, and Hao Ting placed his hand on the doorjamb, to support himself. His heart had been racing from the very moment he pressed his lips to Xi Gu’s, and even now it didn’t slow down. _“Xi Gu didn’t refuse me,”_ he thought and broke into a broad smile. He didn’t know whether he had ever felt such happiness in his entire life. Grinning from ear to ear, Hao Ting swiftly put his shoes on and run to the guards’ quarters.

Inside his room Xi Gu sat down suddenly on the bed, still dumbfounded. He breathed deeply and rather quickly, but still felt a little out of breath. Believe Hao Ting? He already believed him, and it was the most frightening feeling in the world.

~ ~ ~

Yu Xi Gu spent the rest of the day in his tower; thankfully, he had a new book to read and some laundry to do to keep his mind off of things. He thought he wouldn’t sleep a wink that night, but in reality he fell into deep sleep as soon as he laid down. For the first time in a long time he had a night of easy, dreamless sleep.

Xi Gu woke up later than usual, feeling refreshed and light. He quickly jumped to his feet, made his bed, and went into the adjacent room. This room was even smaller than the room where he slept. Inside it was the tower’s furnace, and Xi Gu also had here a little basin on a bench, a bucket with water, a cloth to use as a towel, and a pot. Xi Gu poured some water in the basin and washed his face. He shivered as he usually did since the water was cold, and quickly dried his face and hands with the cloth.

Later, when he approached the entrance to the gallery, — doing his absolute best to forget how Hao Ting stood there just yesterday, — on the wooden floor of the gallery Xi Gu found a little bundle placed on a big green leaf. Inside a bundle was an apple. He regarded it, unsure, but then thought back to how tasty the apples that Hao Ting had brought that time to the library were. That time, the guard had also tried to kiss him. Xi Gu flushed all over his face.

His mouth open, his eyes unseeing, he remembered the delicate touch of Hao Ting’s warm mouth. Almost unconsciously, Xi Gu licked his lips, as if trying to catch the elusive feeling of being kissed. He blushed and shook his head, trying to make any such thoughts disappear. He grabbed the apple and walked with rapid steps through the gallery, but stopped short when he reached the spot where Hao Ting had first directly spoke to him about his feelings. He remembered how at that time he could only think that Hao Ting intended to humiliate him — after the bathhouse, after trying to pick a fight with Xi Gu for “stealing” Hao Ting’s lover — and realized how he, apparently, had been wrong this whole time.

Xi Gu looked around, remembering that night; he remembered bumping into Hao Ting’s broad chest as the guard stepped out of the shadows, and Hao Ting saying that Xi Gu had been on his mind day and night, and Hao Ting laying his hand to his face and saying that he liked Xi Gu.

Had Hao Ting really been in love with him this whole time?

Xi Gu shivered and shook his head once again, wanting to get rid of these thoughts. He realized he was still holding the apple, so he hid it into his pouch and fled to the library.

In the afternoon, when Xi Gu was reading in his favorite nook of the library, he kept getting the apple out of the pouch and putting it on the bench in front of him, determined it was finally time to eat it, but then, overwhelmed with memories of Hao Ting’s constant confessions and yesterday’s kiss, he quickly put it back in the pouch.

Lu Zhi Gang, puzzled and amused, watched him from afar. The librarian wondered whether his friend’s odd behavior was somehow related to Xiang Hao Ting, but he concluded that not knowing was probably better for his mental balance.


	7. Chapter 7

Within the next three days different kinds of food kept appearing wherever Xi Gu went and where he could easily spot them. One morning he was even awakened by the delicious smell of meat buns left by his door.

At first Xi Gu was not sure whether he should eat the food that had been clearly brought by Hao Ting. It was troubling. But after finally eating that ripe apple he had found in the gallery, it was much easier for Xi Gu to reason with himself that the food had nothing to do with this and that it would be a pity not to eat it. Hao Ting would never know what happened to the food anyway.

It was the afternoon of the fourth day after the kiss, and Xi Gu was reading in the library at a table, taking notes about the positions of stars in the northern skies and how they had changed through the years. Suddenly there was a growing murmur and an echoing tramping of feet in the lazy silence of the library. Xi Gu looked up from the book and saw Hao Ting walking towards him with a calm and confident smile on his face. His heart leapt a little bit, and he had to do his absolute best to look into Hao Ting’s face without blushing.

He didn’t notice the guard’s friends staring curiously at him from the doors. In fact, Lu Zhi Gang was standing beside them. He had stopped this small group when they attempted to enter the library, and Hao Ting managed to slip past the librarian when the man started arguing with his friends.

“It’s time to take a break,” said the guard, placing the bundle he had brought on the table next to Xi Gu’s notebook. “Let’s eat.”

Divine smell of freshly cooked chicken and vegetables tickled Xi Gu’s nose, and he realized he was hungry.

“What are you doing?” Xi Gu hissed angrily, his eyebrows rising a little. He finally took a quick look round and with growing panic noticed that everybody were watching them.

Hao Ting didn’t seem to mind the prying eyes. He pulled the nearest bench to Xi Gu’s table and sat down.

Xi Gu could not breathe. The fact that his heart was a-flutter didn’t help him at all. Hao Ting couldn’t possibly think that they would eat in the library! He jumped up from his seat, gathered up his things and run out.

“Everyone, please excuse us,” said Hao Ting loudly and followed Xi Gu.

“It’s a good day to eat outside,” Hao Ting mentioned with an easy smile, circling around Xi Gu. He was the first to get to the bench, and he put there the bundle and quickly unfolded it.

Xi Gu was standing a little apart, unsure of what to do. He run here, to his favorite bench, because a part of him knew Hao Ting would know where to find him. He furrowed his brow, trying to figure out what it would mean if he agreed to have a meal together with the guard, especially after the kiss. He didn’t know the answer, and with every passing moment Xi Gu grew more and more anxious. He probably needed to refuse Hao Ting, and his life would return to being peaceful.

“What do you want?” he asked, more hostile than he had intended.

It seemed Hao Ting hadn’t noticed it. He turned to Xi Gu, holding one of the bamboo containers he had brought with him. With his free hand he run his fingers through his short hair on the side, as if trying to fix it. This casual gesture set Xi Gu’s heart leaping.

“Today I finally have a long afternoon break, and today is also the day they serve chicken, so I asked for two portions to share with you. Do you like it?” Hao Ting asked hopefully as he opened the lid, showing the food to Xi Gu.

Xi Gu looked away and sighed. Hao Ting was really very loud and restless and overly confident. Why would he go to such lengths? This seemed really troubling.

“If you don’t like it, you should just say it,” Hao Ting said, a little upset.

“I don’t like it,” Xi Gu replied quickly and almost turned to leave when Hao Ting caught him by his hand.

“It’s okay if you don’t like it. I will bring something different next time. But you should know that I’m not doing this out of guilt.” Hao Ting got closer and whispered, “I’m doing this because I’m courting you.”

Xi Gu’s mouth became a thin line. “Let go of me,” he said, pushing Hao Ting away, annoyed at the guard’s impudence, but at the same time ashamed of a little blush creeping in his cheeks because of the guard’s proximity.

But Hao Ting was persistent.

“I like you, so I’ve brought you something to eat. It breaks my heart when you’re hungry. I want to take care of you.”

Xi Gu put a hand to Hao Ting’s chest and pushed him away.

“Thank you. I don’t need this.”

Hao Ting rolled his eyes.

“Ple-e-ease.”

Xi Gu didn’t know why he put up with it. He could have left already. But he continued listening to Hao Ting’s endless arguments.

“You are studying hard every day. Besides, you work every other day. You need a lot of strength else you collapse one day. And what then? You should eat.” He offered Xi Gu the container.

Xi Gu paused to think. These arguments were rather compelling. Hao Ting was right, but Xi Gu also had his pride. Now that Hao Ting knew he had to work to live in the palace, Xi Gu didn’t want to seem like he needed help. He did rather well on his own.

“I don’t want your pity,” he said.

Hao Ting shook his head, his eyes bigger than Xi Gu had ever seen them. “This is not pity, I like you! I want to make you happy. I’m happy when you are happy,” he concluded contentedly.

“Then I don’t want you to be happy,” Xi Gu replied defiantly.

Hao Ting blinked, took a slow step back and, looking back at Xi Gu, suddenly roared in frustration.

At first, the sound surprised Xi Gu, but it was harmless and almost childish.

Hao Ting took a step closer, roaring at him, getting too close then moving back, then close again, roaring all the time like an angry mutt.

“What are you doing?” asked Xi Gu with alarm. Had Hao Ting gone mad?

“Do you like it now?”

“What?”

“I’m not happy. Eat!” he pushed the container into Xi Gu’s hands.

Xi Gu looked up at him, still confused, and the guard roared once more, now almost playfully. Finally Xi Gu understood what all that was about.

_“What a fool,”_ he thought with a fondness, and his lips curved into a smile.

“You smiled! Yes! He smiled!” Hao Ting yelled, grinning, and Xi Gu had to take the container from his hands because Hao Ting started jumping and dancing in exhilaration.

Watching Hao Ting dance, Xi Gu shook his head and sat on the bench. He opened the container and gulped. The food looked delicious.

“Do you like it?” Hao Ting asked when he plopped on the other side of the bench, taking the second container and opening it. “I like chicken the most. The cooks make it juicy and spicy.”

“It looks alright,” Xi Gu confessed. He was more impressed with the variety of vegetables, to be honest. It seemed they were cooked in some kind of sauce, so the first thing he did when Hao Ting politely offered him chopsticks was separating the meat and the vegetables. He wanted to taste everything one by one.

Hao Ting watched him with curious eyes and puffed out his chest a little, seeing his baby Yu happily eat what he had brought. This feeling wasn’t akin to a sense of triumph; it was closer to satisfaction with a bit of pride.

While Xi Gu was concentrated on dividing and tasting his food, Hao Ting stealthily moved closer to him, his uniform’s sleeve now almost touching the white sleeve of Xi Gu’s robes. Xi Gu hadn’t noticed this yet. Excited and happy, Hao Ting tried very hard to stay calm.

“Out of all the food I’ve brought you, what did you like the most?” he asked innocently.

“Well,” Xi Gu mused, still fully concentrated on the meal before him, “I think the meat buns were very good, but peaches were the best.”

He realized he had admitted to eating Hao Ting’s food only after the words escaped his mouth. Xi Gu bit his lower lip, and silently cursed himself.

Unaware of Xi Gu’s inner struggle, Hao Ting broke into a smile.

“These peaches are from my mother’s garden. When I visited my parents last time, she gave me a lot to take with me, and I instantly thought about sharing with you. Also I remembered I’ve promised to bring you some,” he added flirtatiously and looked at Xi Gu. What he saw almost took his breath away.

Sitting right beside him, his shoulders relaxed, Xi Gu was looking up at him with cautious interest, and Hao Ting could see every little spot on his face; the cute shapes of his right ear and of his right side-whisker; every strand of Xi Gu’s carefully combed hair that was put up into a tight knot; and every single shade of Xi Gu’s beautiful eye color.

In the meantime Xi Gu was thinking how Hao Ting didn’t seem mean anymore. He had expected to feel the same sense of defeat he experienced when the guard had made him eat the apples in the library, but with his carefree words about his mother’s garden Hao Ting unknowingly erased any doubt about the purity of his intentions. This change was refreshing.

Hao Ting finally shook himself out of his daze and cleared his throat.

“Today I will visit my parents’ house again; I have a two-day break. This means we can’t have another meal together today.”

_“As if I agreed to eat dinner with you,”_ Xi Gu’s inner voice remarked snidely.

Hao Ting continued, “So you should go to the kitchens, and ask for dinner!”

“You think they’ll just give me some food?” Xi Gu asked dubiously. He never really thought about visiting the kitchens himself. The cooks mostly served the Royal family and people related to them, as well as Royal servants and guards, but the nobility were expected to have their own cooks, just like Lu Zhi Gang’s family had three. To have a servant, you would either have to pay them or own them as property, so Yu Xi Gu had none.

Hao Ting nodded enthusiastically.

“My friends and I always go there and ask the cooks to give us seconds. And we don’t really belong to the court yet!”

Baffled by what he had just leant about the kitchens, Xi Gu said, “Really?”

Hao Ting seemed to have understood this question in his own way.

“Yes, to belong to the court we will have to pass the training and the exam at the end of it. If I pass that exam successfully, I can even try to become a general. I would just have to undergo more training,” Hao Ting nodded with confidence. Then he cast a quick mischievous glance at Xi Gu, stuck out his tongue and started breathing like a dog on a warm summer evening.

This time Xi Gu immediately understood the joke and giggled. Hao Ting put his hands up and in front of his chest like paws, and imitated a dog once more. Xi Gu could almost see him wagging an imaginary tail.

“Stop it,” he said, lightly slapping Hao Ting’s upper arm. “You might drop the food.”

Hao Ting actually stopped, and the warm look in his eyes as he regarded Xi Gu’s smiling face nearly made Xi Gu blush.

They talked about small things while they ate, and after that Hao Ting walked him to the library. Just before walking out of the doors, Hao Ting turned around for a second and, seeing Xi Gu look at him, quickly put up his hands, stuck out his tongue and imitated a dog once again. Xi Gu smiled at him, and Hao Ting, happy beyond measure, left for the lectures.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been one year since MODC first aired! Happy anniversary, everyone!  
> And thank you for your patience! Did I really need to copy that one scene from the series? Who knows!

“Oh, you’re back,” Xi Gu said when he saw Hao Ting again two days later. He was surprised with himself as he was actually glad to see Hao Ting.

The guard was waiting for Xi Gu outside of the stargazer’s tower with a large bundle in his hands.

“I promised to have lunch with you whenever I could, so here I am,” Hao Ting answered with a smile. “My parents sent a lot of food with me, and we should eat while it’s still warm.”

Xi Gu didn’t remember Hao Ting ever making such a promise, but he was really curious about the dishes Hao Ting had brought. _Plus,_ he said to himself, _it would be really bad to say no to the food offered by someone’s parents._ So he nodded and let Hao Ting lead him to their usual bench.

Hao Ting noticed that Xi Gu kept glancing at him so he was about to say something playful, but Xi Gu spoke to him first.

“I think I’ve never seen you in plain clothes,” Xi Gu mused. “And your hair looks... different.”

Hao Ting felt the sense of dread creep down his spine. He had been so happy thinking about seeing Xi Gu today that he had forgotten about his appearance.

Feeling utterly self-conscious, he confessed, “My sister and her friends sometimes braid my hair when I hang out with them.”

“Mmm,” Xi Gu said enigmatically. Now he stared directly at Hao Ting’s hair like it was a mystery he was trying to solve. The guard didn’t know what to think.

They arrived to the stream, and Hao Ting put his burden on the bench. He shot a quick look at Xi Gu.

Xi Gu was biting his lower lip. He was thinking how Hao Ting looked different from usual. His uniform consisted of blue robes and brown light leather outer wear that imitated soldiers’ heavy armor. Hao Ting always looked sharp in it, but now he had a very homely look to him, wearing green robes with flowery embroidery on the sleeves. He looked every bit a young master from a rich family. But what fascinated Xi Gu the most was Hao Ting’s hairdo. Hao Ting already had shaved sides and the rest of his hair cut short, so he usually wore the central part sleeked back into a rather small knot, yet now this part was braided into a very puffy queue that made the shaved sides look even more prominent.

“So, do you like it?” Hao Ting asked nervously, unable to read Xi Gu’s face.

“Yes,” Xi Gu said with such delight that Hao Ting was immediately reassured. “Can I touch it?” he continued.

Hao Ting blinked a couple of times, trying to process Xi Gu’s words. Stupefied with astonishment, he just shook his head in agreement and silently watched Xi Gu approach him and carefully touch with his fingers the short-cropped hair on one of his shaved sides. The mad beating of his heart covered even the sound of the flowing stream.

All Hao Ting wanted now was to kiss Xi Gu senseless. After all, his cute face was so close.

“Aren’t you afraid of getting kissed?” said Hao Ting in a husky voice and raised an eyebrow. He felt like he really was an animal.

Xi Gu jumped with surprise. He quickly took his hand away and raised frightened eyes to Hao Ting’s.

“We should eat,” the guard said, turned around and went to sit on the bench. He carefully unwrapped the bundle and demonstrated the dishes one by one. “Meat buns; steamed fish with some beans and vegetables; broiled chicken; lots of rice; persimmons and apples; nuts and dried fruits; some sweet buns. What would you like?”

Xi Gu, still eyeing Hao Ting warily, sat slowly on the other side of the bench and sighed. “Fish and some rice first, please.”

Hao Ting did his best not to smile. On the inside he was almost bursting with joy. Xi Gu wanted to touch him, willingly and genuinely. Xi Gu was curious about him.

And yet, Hao Ting felt like he needed to clarify something.

“I got my hair cut when I passed the exam to become the guard in training,” he said, putting Xi Gu’s food on a container lid and handing it to him along with a pair of chopsticks. “I had made a bet with my friends. They teased me that I wouldn’t pass the exam as I am as dumb as they are, but I said that everyone who passes it shaves their head in celebration. But only Sun Bo and I have passed it.”

“Is he that friend of yours?” Xi Gu said, swirling his forefinger above and around his head, hinting at Sun Bo’s shaved head.

“Yes, he name is Sun Bo Xiang,” Hao Ting laughed a little, happy that Xi Gu knew something about him. “My mom caught us when he was shaving my head, so I have this odd haircut.”

“It suits you,” Xi Gu said, scrunching his nose a little and looking amused. He looked so dazzling that Hao Ting felt giddy.

“I think so, too, but senior guards and teachers think it is inappropriate. And Sun Bo just looks like a monk,” he added with a laugh. Xi Gu smiled, too. Hao Ting was suddenly overcome with need to wrap baby Yu in his arms this very moment. Xi Gu was lucky that a small tower of food stood between them. Having lunches with Xi Gu was really becoming a study in self-control.

Hao Ting cleared his throat and asked the question which interested him.

“I’ve noticed you really like staying in the library. You sit there till nighttime. Even the librarian leaves before you. Do you like it that much?”

Xi Gu shook his head slowly and answered seriously. “Not really. But I can read and study there, and Zhi Gang is very kind. He allows me to stay long after closing hours.”

“Can’t you just read at home?” said Hao Ting and furrowed his brow.

Xi Gu looked somewhat flustered as he said, “I don’t have any lanterns at home, so I go to the library.”

Hao Ting bit the inside of his cheek. He suddenly remembered how his sister had thrown a little tantrum when new lanterns didn’t match the interior of her room and demanded new ones, and felt a pang of sadness.

“I see,” he said softly and sent Xi Gu a smile. “It’s good that you have a friend like Lu Zhi Gang.”

“Yeah,” Xi Gu nodded and smiled back.

They spent the rest of the afternoon break eating in comfortable silence.

It was the evening of the same day, and Xi Gu found Hao Ting waiting for him outside of the library. Now the guard was in his uniform, his hair looking as proper as possible. Xi Gu chuckled a little, but then became somewhat frightened. He was falling under Hao Ting’s influence too easily. With a slight frown he walked down the stairs towards the guard.

Hao Ting smiled and run his fingers through his hair when he noticed Xi Gu. He moved away from the courtyard wall he had been leaning against and greeted Xi Gu with a simple, “Hey.”

His fluid movement and the tone of his voice sent a thrill up Xi Gu’s spine. He nodded in lieu of a greeting, avoiding eye contract, and walked to his tower, feeling rather than seeing Hao Ting join him.

When he managed to calm himself down, Xi Gu remembered something.

“I want to thank you for recommending me to go to the kitchens and ask for dinner that day. They really give me food without any questions, and quite a lot,” Xi Gu looked up at Hao Ting who was walking beside him through the gallery, and gave him a grateful smile.

He remembered how the first time he had showed up, the cooks had gotten very flustered at his arrival and tried to give him more than he could carry, one of them saying that he should come every day; it was quite nice.

“Just like I said, the cooks are good people. And they probably give you a lot of food because they’re all in love with a boy who can read stars,” Hao Ting teased him, saying the last sentence in a deep tempting voice, enjoying how Xi Gu blushed furiously in response. He was in a very playful mood today.

“Nonsense! I don’t think they even know who I am,” Xi Gu said in a huff. He felt like he was losing to Hao Ting in a game he didn’t understand.

Hao Ting knew that when Xi Gu was irritated, he tried to chase him away. He watched Yu Xi Gu curiously, waiting for it.

After just a few moments Xi Gu’s grip on the strap of his pouch tightened, and he said, “You didn’t have to come with me all the way here.”

“I disagree”, said Hao Ting, pointedly looking around. “It’s late, and it’s dangerous for you to walk alone in this isolated and poorly lit part of the palace.”

“I have been walking this way every day for as long as I can remember,” retorted Xi Gu. He stopped and looked at the guard with an angry glare. “Besides, I’m a guy and I can fight back.”

Hao Ting stopped as well. “As a guard I can say that some bandit wouldn’t think much about it. He would just see an opportunity and attack. So it’s good that I walk you home.”

“You have some crazy fantasies,” Xi Gu frowned.

“They are not crazy. And I’m just trying to be helpful,” Hao Ting said.

“Thank you. I don’t need your help,” Xi Gu said and shook his head in disbelief. Hao Ting really had some weird ideas.

He turned to walk back home but only made a few steps when Hao Ting caught him from behind, with a hand cupped over Xi Gu’s mouth. Xi Gu’s heart leapt.

With a bit of struggle, he managed to pull Hao Ting’s hand away to speak.

“You! What are you doing?”

“I’m telling you. These aren’t fantasies. You have to be careful,” Hao Ting said, still holding Xi Gu close with one hand and pointing to his face with another. A moment later Hao Ting tried to catch him in a tight embrace, but Xi Gu first pinched him and then elbowed him in the stomach. Hao Ting bent over. Xi Gu didn’t think the blow was strong as it was only a friendly romp and Hao Ting even laughed a little, so he smiled in triumph as he began to walk away. But suddenly Hao Ting started wailing.

“Oh! It hurts! It hurts!”

Scared of Hao Ting’s reaction, Xi Gu stepped closer, and in a blink of an eye he found himself pressed to one of the pillars. Hao Ting looked him in the eye with a smug smile of a winner.

His right hand pinned Xi Gu’s left hand above his head, and his left hand lightly pushed on Xi Gu’s chest to ensure he wouldn’t escape.

“And you’re saying you don’t need me?” he raised an eyebrow mockingly.

Xi Gu sighed, grabbed Hao Ting’s face with his free hand and asked, like he was talking to a naughty child, “What are you doing?”

Hao Ting face changed in a split of a moment, now looking annoyed and resolute. He shook off Xi Gu’s hand from his face and swiftly pushed one leg between Xi Gu’s legs, moving closer into Xi Gu’s personal space.

Xi Gu gulped.

“Right now I’m a bad guy,” Hao Ting said contentedly and laughed; his laughter a loud, vile sound.

Xi Gu gasped in shock, turning his head away, afraid of what could come.

“You can cry for help all you want, no one will hear,” Hao Ting shrieked in the same nasty voice.

Xi Gu reasoned with himself, _“Hao Ting isn’t a bad guy. He wants to hear something from me.”_ The problem was, he didn’t know exactly what this weirdo wanted to hear, but if his guess was right, he didn’t want to say it anyway.

Hao Ting stuck out his tongue and with an ominous slurping sound moved it very close to Xi Gu’s face, as if trying to lick it.

Xi Gu flinched, now almost sure Hao Ting’s tongue actually made contact with his cheek, and yelled, “Okay, okay! I need you!”

Hao Ting immediately put his tongue back in and asked seriously, “What exactly do you need?”

“I need you to wait for me in the evening,” said Xi Gu, accepting defeat.

“And?” demanded Hao Ting.

“I need you to walk me home.”

“What else?” Hao Ting asked joyfully, waiting for the right answer.

Xi Gu paused and frowned. “What else?” he asked Hao Ting, confused.

Hao Ting sighed and stepped back, fixing Xi Gu’s robes with one swift movement. Then he slapped his hands on the pillar on either side of Xi Gu’s face, caging him between his body and the pillar once again. Xi Gu was happy Hao Ting’s hand wasn’t pressed over his heart anymore, else he could’ve felt his quickening heartbeat.

“Hurry up and fall in love with me,” whispered Hao Ting almost angrily.

Xi Gu turned his eyes away, as he felt happy for some reason. He could feel the hot intensity of Hao Ting’s stare on his skin. The guard was moving closer again, now slowly and with obvious intent, and Xi Gu gulped. He ducked under Hao Ting’s left arm and rushed home, leaving Hao Ting to stand there, dumbfounded.

The nighttime came, and Xiang Hao Ting and Sun Bo Xiang were keeping watch on the Northwestern wall that separated the Palace and the city from the vast forest.

“So you are telling me he is very fond of _carrots_?” said Bo Xiang and raised an eyebrow quizzically.

“Yeah,” Hao Ting nodded enthusiastically and looked at his friend with a smile. “He carefully picks every bit of it and eats it first.”

“And you know it because you watch him closely every time he has lunch with you?” Bo Xiang comically shivered. “Man, you creep me out.”

Hao Ting just giggled at that, and then said, “You don’t understand the heart of a man in love! And he smiles at me now. When I see the smile on his pretty lips, and how his face gets cuter, I just want to...”

Hao Ting hugged himself tight and squirmed, howling from the excess of happiness.

“Cut it out, now!” Bo Xiang hissed at him, almost laughing, and kicked his shin. “What are you? A dog in heat?”

Hao Ting stopped, and a moment later they heard their senior speak, the one who was standing guard at the foot of the wall inside the palace.

“Is that a wolf?” The note of alarm was in his voice.

“No, sir! It’s just a dog howling!” Bo Xiang yelled back. Xiang Hao Ting glared at his friend, and Sun Bo just raised an eyebrow.

“A dog?” The senior guard persisted.

“A stray, probably!” Bo Xiang yelled again. “Nothing to worry about, sir!”

“I’m not talking to you today!” Hao Ting whispered to him angrily.

Bo Xiang rolled his eyes and snorted. He knew Hao Ting never held grudges for longer than 10 minutes. And that he would begin telling him about Xi Gu again in less than 5.

~ ~ ~

Ever since that day Hao Ting had started bringing Xi Gu lunch almost every day and occasionally dinner. In the evening, when he could, he walked Xi Gu to the tower. He would tell Xi Gu about his day, as well as anything and everything that came into his head.

Xi Gu came to like listening to the guard tell him every detail of his day as emotionally as only Hao Ting could. He often found his stories amusing and frankly a bit exaggerated. He would have begun thinking of Hao Ting as of a friend, if only Hao Ting hadn’t always reminded him about his feelings or looked at him with that look in his eyes that said more than any words could tell.

Xi Gu would also find food waiting for him somewhere he could find it when Hao Ting couldn’t come to share a meal with him. One day, probably a week or two after he was pressed against the pillar, when unwrapping his lunch Xi Gu found a piece of paper lying beside the food container.

He turned it over in his hand and frowned, looking at the note.

He could understand that Hao Ting wanted to write, “Baby Yu, I was thinking about you all day,” but clearly he made some mistakes and his handwriting was not the best. Xi Gu felt like he needed to see Hao Ting immediately.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is considerably small because I have no guts to write some hurt/comfort that's supposed to come next (it's nothing big, but to write 'comfort' I have to write 'hurt', and that's upsetting). Also, next week I have a week off, and I'll be away from my laptop, so you'll have to wait to see the new chapter, and I apologize in advance.

The shed in his mother’s garden was a cluttered space that no one really took care of, and Hao Ting sneezed loudly when his nose got too itchy, but a moment later he returned to going through the things which were left to collect dust in here. He found some pretty good stuff like furniture and vases, large plant pots, rugs, and anything that had ever decorated the house and the garden but now was out of fashion, and yet the thing he was searching for was nowhere to be seen.

“My dear, what are you looking for in here?” he heard his mother’s voice and turned to see her stand in the doorway. “And you are still in your uniform! I understand that it suits you a lot, and your father is all glowing with pride when he sees you in it, but you should change into something less official once you get home to spend time with your family.”

She chided him in her tender voice, and Hao Ting grinned as he walked up to her to hug the woman he loved the most.

“I’ve missed you so much, mother,” he said, gently wrapping his arms around her and putting his head on her shoulder as if he still was a little boy and not a young man towering over her small frame. She smelled like usual, like flowers she always wore in her complex hairdo, and looked as gorgeous as ever in her bright-colored robes that fit the latest fashion.

“I think it’s been a little over a week since you visited us last time,” she said with a chuckle, and with her gentle hands she cupped his cheeks and moved his head to look at his face. “I still can’t believe you are already 18. I see my little boy whenever I see you.”

“Mo-o-om!” said Hao Ting half jesting, half in earnest.

“But I have to say you’ve matured recently. Has anything happened? Have you met someone?” She said like she expected some delightful news and patted his cheeks.

His mother liked all these romantic stories very much, and her romantic story with his father was still going on. Hao Ting always found his parents’ relationship really admirable.

“Well,” Hao Ting said, and his mouth twisted into a grin. “I might’ve.”

“Is she cute?”

Hao Ting just continued grinning in response. Xi Gu was indeed very cute.

His mother clicked her tongue in annoyance. “Not going to tell me, am I right?”

Hao Ting shook his head, and then asked, stepping away from her and pointing his finger at the heaps of things around them, “Do you know where the old lanterns from Yong Qing’s room are? The ones she didn’t like? I need one.”

“What do you need it for?” his mother asked with a frown.

A little embarrassed and trying to be elusive, Hao Ting answered, “To read!”

“Oh,” Mrs. Xiang said, surprised. She had never thought her son would ever pronounce this word in his life. “There is a little chest under that bench,” she pointed to the far corner on her right. “That’s if you need the enameled gold-and-blue lanterns your sister rejected. You pour some oil inside, and it will burn until the oil evaporates.”

Hao Ting nodded and went to fetch one. When he opened the chest and saw the lanterns, he marveled at their beauty. He couldn’t understand why Yong Qing had rejected them. Holding the one he picked in his hands, he got up and smiled, thinking how Xi Gu would probably like it a lot. Then he bent down and picked another one, deciding that one lantern might not be enough to light Xi Gu’s whole room for him to read in the evening.

Mrs. Xiang watched him with a twinkle in her eye.

“Do you need a lantern for the outdoors? It has a candle in it, and its handle is very comfortable on the hands.”

Hao Ting chewed on his lower lip thoughtfully, remembering his little spat with Xi Gu, and nodded. The area around stargazer’s tower was poorly lit, that was true.

“You can find it behind the clay pots over there,” she nodded to the wall on the opposite side from the doors.

She watched him fetch this one, too, and look at all these lanterns with such an expression like he was very pleased with himself.

“Mother, I need to go,” said Hao Ting, his mind set on how Xi Gu would react to such a gift.

“Wait,” she stepped in front of him to block his path as she could see he was about to run somewhere. “I came here to say the food will be served shortly. Change your clothes and come to the table.”

Hao Ting looked conflicted for a moment, but then nodded, his excitement dying down visibly. He met her eyes and smiled, “I’ll be there in a moment.”

Mrs. Xiang watched him go in the direction of his room, gently cradling the lanterns to his chest, and smiled. Her son had definitely met someone.

~ ~ ~

Xi Gu couldn’t find Hao Ting anywhere. He kept glancing at a side of Hao Ting’s note that was sticking from his notebook. The note made him restless, in a pleasant way, but at the same time it made him irritated. But he was wondering whether it was even something worth talking to Hao Ting about.

The next day, in the afternoon, he locked his room’s door and turned to walk downstairs when he heard someone’s clothes rustle at the bottom of the stairs. Xi Gu gulped at the thought that he might see Hao Ting right now. He ran down the steps and turned the corner. He was disappointed to see that it wasn’t Hao Ting.

Sun Bo Xiang was sitting on the lowest step, unwrapping a very familiar looking cloth wrapped around a food container.

They both went still as they saw each other, and the bald guard’s embarrassed face gave him away. Sun Bo Xiang was the first to get over the initial shock. He jumped to his feet and raised his hands like he was trying to prove he wasn’t guilty.

“I’m not opening it, I swear. I was just curious what’s on today’s menu in the kitchens! I’ll leave your lunch here then.”

“Wait,” Xi Gu said and walked down the stairs to face him properly. “Why did you bring it to me?”

“Well, Hao Ting is away, so he asked me to bring you lunches from the kitchens and put some little papers in there along with the food.”

Bo Xiang cast a curious glance at the half-unwrapped bundle, and Xi Gu realized he was probably more interested in the note than in the food.

“So he’s away?”

“Yeah, he’s visiting his family because he got a couple of days off.”

“I see,” Xi Gu sighed, without realizing it, and Bo Xiang’s curious glance shifted from the bundle to him.

First Xi Gu didn’t notice it, but then he also looked down to check his own robes. “What, is there some spot there?” he asked with a frown. There didn’t seem to be any problem with his clothes.

“No, everything’s fine,” Bo Xiang answered with a strange secretive smile, raising his eyes from Xi Gu’s hips. He looked like he really wanted to ask something, but he said nothing and just nodded his head in satisfaction.

“Did Hao Ting say anything about me?” said Xi Gu casually, his eyes on the ground. He didn’t want to seem like he wanted to know the answer.

“Oh, he talks about you a lot,” said the bald guard and chuckled. “To anyone who would listen.”

“What?” Xi Gu looked up sharply.

“Yeah,” Hao Ting’s friend said like he was agreeing that it was rather scandalous. “To anyone who wants to listen and to anyone who doesn’t.”

The way he said it made it clear no one really wanted to, but Xiang Hao Ting told them anyway. Xi Gu looked at Sun Bo in shock. It was all very embarrassing.

Bo Xiang saw that Xi Gu didn’t think it was funny or flattering. If anything, he looked very troubled.

“He really told everyone about you, and by ‘everyone’ I mean our group of friends. But we are happy for him — and for you, you know,” Bo Xiang reassured him.

Xi Gu still had the same odd look on his face, and after a pause Bo Xiang added gravely, “If you don’t like him, just tell him. He’s not stupid, he’ll understand if you reject him.”

And yet, he still couldn’t understand the emotion on Yu Xi Gu’s face. He then excused himself and went to the guards’ quarters, worrying whether he had done something wrong.

Xi Gu nodded to him, not really able to react. He sat down on the bottom step feeling helpless as he was left to find the answer to the question that hadn’t been asked.

He unwrapped his lunch and slowly reached for the note, and when he opened it, Xi Gu smiled and realized that the answer was, _a little_.

Even in the evening, when he was working in the library, he kept glancing at the edges of now two notes stuck between his notebook’s pages. The movement of the candle glow seemed almost magical today, and his mind drifted off from the letters he was rewriting for the client to what Sun Bo Xiang had told him in the afternoon. Using Bo Xiang’s logic, if he, Yu Xi Gu, didn’t like to spend time with Hao Ting, he should’ve told Hao Ting about this already.

Blushing a little, Xi Gu remembered Hao Ting’s kiss and confession, and thought that he had never given Hao Ting a response. If he rejected the confession now, Xiang Hao Ting would most probably stop coming to see him, and the problem was that recently he had come to like spending time with Hao Ting.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, everyone, for your patience! <3

The next day Hao Ting was running through the gallery to Xi Gu’s tower, carrying three lanterns in his hands and an ample meal for two in the sack on his back, when he realized he might had gone a little bit too far. He didn’t know how he would explain all of this to baby Yu. _‘Had gotten a little bit too excited’_ was probably not a good explanation. Xi Gu would only look at him crossly.

As he was sitting at the bottom step of the stairs to the tower waiting for Xi Gu, it occurred to Hao Ting that it was probably not too late to return back to his parents’ house. Of course, they lived quite far away from the Palace down the main street, but his parents had pleaded for him to have the afternoon meal with them as it was still his day off and he didn’t need to return to the guards’ quarters until evening. At the same time, he really wanted to see Xi Gu.

Hao Ting blinked when a warm droplet of water landed on his nose, waking him up from his thoughts. Then another one landed on his left hand, and seconds later the air was already buzzing with the sound of a swarm of heavy droplets falling on the ground and moving closer to him. The sky grew darker in the east, and in the dimness Hao Ting spotted a lean person in white clothes run hastily through the gallery towards him.

“Don’t just sit here, you’ll get wet,” Xi Gu told him as he rushed past him up the stairs and to the doors. Hao Ting jumped to his feet and followed him without thinking.

They arrived to the doors at the same time, and Hao Ting caught Xi Gu glance at him hesitantly, and then go to unlock the main doors.

Xi Gu’s hesitation and reddening ears reminded Hao Ting of his own confession and daring kiss, and how at that time his heart had been beating like it was trying to hammer its way out of his ribcage. Xi Gu didn’t want to let Hao Ting into his room again yet and it was understandable, but at the same time it was proof that Xi Gu also _remembered_. Hao Ting bit his lower lip to hide his smug little smile.

The lock clicked and the doors opened, revealing a spacious set of rooms behind them. Hao Ting blinked a few times, marveling at their beauty that was comparable to the beauty of the princes’ quarters, only simpler and more demure. The walls, the ceilings, and the wooden beams supporting them were painted red and green, and these colors stood out the most in comparison with natural colors of the rest of the interior. Even though it was getting dim inside, Hao Ting could feel that the rooms would be bright and airy once they had enough light.

“Come in,” Xi Gu said, regarding Hao Ting’s astonished face with amusement.

“Do you also live here?” Hao Ting asked, turning his head and trying to take everything in as he stepped inside while Xi Gu shut the doors behind them so as not to let in the dampness of the coming rain.

Xi Gu became thoughtful.

“No, but I often spend my time here, or look at the stars from the deck, and I also have to take care of these rooms, clean and dust them and so on.”

Xi Gu shrugged nonchalantly, and Hao Ting was suddenly struck by a thought that the small room where Xi Gu slept was probably meant to be a servant’s quarters. It was painful to even think about this.

“Why don’t you live here?” said Hao Ting in a rather sorrowful tone.

“I would need to spend a lot of money on the lighting here, and in winter I need a lot less wood to warm just one room.” Xi Gu spoke so calmly, like he didn’t care, but the pain in Hao Ting’s heart only grew stronger.

Xi Gu was right when he had told him that Hao Ting’s life was very different from his own. Hao Ting wanted to help, but didn’t know how.

Xi Gu looked at him, frowning in confusion as he didn’t understand why Hao Ting had suddenly grown so gloomy when only a few moments ago he had been so impressed by the beauty of the tower’s interior. Frankly, it was rather flattering to see someone transfixed by the splendor of his house.

“Let’s go upstairs,” he offered and waived in the direction of a staircase that was hidden behind an unremarkable tapestry with a winter landscape depicted on it.

They climbed the stairs, and by the time they got to the top floor, the clouds had already covered the skies, and it got so dark inside that Hao Ting could barely see where he was stepping.

In the darkness, Xi Gu fetched and lit a candle end, and he finally saw what Hao Ting was carrying in his hands. He snorted in surprise.

“Why do you look like a street vendor?”

Hao Ting also remembered his embarrassing burden.

“Ta-dah,” he said, forcing himself to smile as brightly as he could as he spread his arms to show everything he carried. “This is all for you. And I have lunch for the both of us.”

The initial embarrassment left him, and Hao Ting felt the pride he had felt before, when he had found the lanterns in his mother’s garden shed.

Xi Gu gasped and, having carefully put the candle on the nearest little table, he grabbed one of the enameled lanterns from Hao Ting’s hands. His mouth slightly open, he turned it over in his hands, looking at it from every angle, and then looked up, his eyes happy.

“Is it really for me?”

He was fidgeting like he got the best present for his birthday, and Hao Ting had to fight the urge to pin baby Yu to the nearest vertical surface. Instead, the guard shook his head violently in agreement, unable to speak.

Xi Gu smiled brilliantly.

Hao Ting closed his eyes for a second and took a deep calming breath. When he opened his eyes, Xi Gu was looking at his lantern with a smile, and the guard was able to think more clearly.

“I have some oil for it in my sack.” Hao Ting handed the second enameled lantern to Xi Gu and, having placed the bigger lantern on the floor, he took the sack off and fetched a vial with oil from it. “We should light these two lanterns and have a meal.”

Xi Gu nodded and helped him light the lanterns from the candle.

Hao Ting looked at him smile as the lanterns sprang into life, swallowing the darkness around them with their bright light, and his lips, too, relaxed into a satisfied smile.

Xi Gu looked up at him and, seeing Hao Ting stand so close and regard him like this, he felt shy and nervous.

“I don’t really have any suitable furniture in here. I’m afraid we will have to sit on the floor. I’ll bring a quilt to sit on,” he said and rushed downstairs with his candle, leaving Hao Ting with two lanterns in his hands.

Hao Ting chuckled. Xi Gu was indeed very cute. He put one of the lanterns on the little table that he had noticed before, and with the second one in his hands, Hao Ting decided to look around.

While the rooms downstairs looked like they were meant for receiving guests, this part of the tower seemed more like a living area despite its comparatively small size and the lack of furnishings. Still, it was a rather large space with rectangular shape and lower ceilings as the top floor was under the sloping roof.

On his left, behind a painted screen, Hao Ting found a bed frame without any mattress. Its massive structure and four colorful bedposts showed that it had once belonged to wealthy owners, as Hao Ting had only seen this kind of bed when he peeked inside the Royal bedroom while standing guard outside its doors. He left this nook and went to explore some more as he didn’t want to get caught staring at the bed, especially by Xi Gu.

Everywhere he looked, the guard could see the evidence of wealth, but these elements like little tables or tapestries and paintings served no other purpose other than decorative, making the space feel like it was not lived in.

He turned with a sigh and froze on the spot. The wall nearest to the staircase had a large painting of the night sky. Hao Ting could recognize some of the constellations and their relative positions. He had never seen anything like this before.

When Xi Gu returned with a quilt over his shoulder, he found Xiang Hao Ting standing by the wall near the stairs and examining the painted stars with great interest.

Hao Ting nodded to the painting and mumbled, “Cool.”

He felt like he couldn’t really appreciate the grandeur of it, but even in his opinion this was exciting.

Xi Gu put the quilt on the ground near the bundle with food and approached him.

“This is my father’s painting,” Xi Gu explained sheepishly. He pointed to the doors that led outside. “The stargazing deck is behind these doors. My father started to paint this when he had only become an apprentice to the previous stargazer, and finished it when I was born.”

“Even the smallest stars are here,” noticed Hao Ting, pointing to the ones he could recognize.

“Yes, it is very accurate,” Xi Gu agreed. “I think my mother helped him with it. She was also very keen on stargazing, just as much as my father. They’ve met because she saw him read the manuscript by her favorite author, and they had a big argument about its contents.”

Hao Ting cast a curious glance at Xi Gu. The other was still looking at the painting with a soft smile on his lips and gesticulating as he talked.

“My mother was sure that star chart readings are absolute nonsense. But my father was taught to read the stars, and was very passionate about it. They say he was really good,” mused Xi Gu.

“That’s why you decided to become a stargazer? You wanted to follow in their footsteps?”

Xi Gu shrugged his shoulders, still not looking at him, which allowed Hao Ting to continue admiring his pretty face and its many expressions. He noticed that when Xi Gu was thoughtful, he looked down, pursed his lips a little and talked in a very cute way. And baby Yu also looked like a very smart scholar. It was sexy.

“I remember that they told me many stories about stars when I was little, so quite naturally I got interested in them.”

“And you can predict the future just like your father?” Hao Ting was intrigued.

Xi Gu looked up at him with the quizzical brow, his eyes laughing.

“What? You don’t believe it?” Hao Ting asked.

“Watching the skies, I can predict droughts, cold winters and many other things like this. For example, this rain will stop in a few hours,” Xi Gu replied matter-of-factly. “But I don’t know whether stars have anything to do with our fate.”

Hao Ting grinned. “But you still do star chart readings.”

“It’s fun,” said Xi Gu and returned the guard’s roguish smile. He went to sit on the quilt and began opening the containers with food as he continued, “My father left a lot of manuscripts where he shared his thoughts on predictions. Some of his ideas are very useful when I do such readings, but they are more useful since he documented everything about the weather, and the skies, and the stars, and many other things.”

Hao Ting suddenly thought that he hadn’t noticed when Xi Gu had become this talkative. He remembered how distant and cautious Yu Xi Gu had been before, and realized how different he was now, and his heart began quivering with happiness.

Slowly, he approached Xi Gu and sat down close to him, placing the lantern on the floor besides them.

Hao Ting watched Xi Gu attentively, hopefully, so when Yu Xi Gu turned his head to hand the guard his meal, he faced one very excited Xiang Hao Ting.

“What?” he asked, flustered.

Hao Ting took the container lid with his portion of food from Xi Gu’s hands and put it aside. He was looking into Xi Gu’s big pretty eyes as he leaned in.

Xi Gu’s eyes got even bigger, but he didn’t close them, looking in nervous confusion at the guard. Hao Ting grinned and moved a bit closer, and Xi Gu finally closed his eyes.

Hao Ting paused and for a moment he just admired the cuteness of Xi Gu’s face.

He could kiss Xi Gu right now; that was true. He wanted to kiss Xi Gu, also true. But if he, Xiang Hao Ting, had had to become more serious, then baby Yu needed to become more honest. It was time for punishment.

“Woof!” Hao Ting said playfully.

Xi Gu opened his eyes, his brow furrowing. Hao Ting’s face was very close, almost golden in the lanterns’ light, and the look in his eyes was both fond and teasing. Xi Gu could feel blood rush to his cheeks. He was anticipating a kiss he shouldn’t have been anticipating. And Hao Ting knew it.

“R-r-r-r, woof!” Hao Ting continued, without pause. “Woof, woof!”

Xi Gu looked at him cautiously. Hao Ting was really like a big cute dog right now. And the more the guard barked, the more Xi Gu calmed down, forgetting his embarrassment.

“What are you doing?” Xi Gu said with a little whine that, to his surprise, came out rather naturally.

Hao Ting stuck out his tongue like a dog on a hot day, and started breathing like said dog.

“Stop it. It’s gross,” Xi Gu laughed. “Let’s eat.”

Finally they could eat, and after a long silence of tasting and enjoying the food, Xi Gu put down his dish and looked up at Hao Ting.

“What about your family?” he said, unsure of what he really wanted to know.

Hao Ting met his eyes, surprised, and bit the end of his chopstick as he was thinking what to say.

“My father is a court musician. My mother is a distant relative of the King. My sister is still too young, so she lives with them.”

“Didn’t you say you are the second child?” Xi Gu frowned, tilting his head a little.

Hao Ting smiled at the thought that Xi Gu remembered such little facts about his family.

“I have an older brother. But he ran away with his lover, and I became the eldest child. Now it is my duty to make my parents proud. So I became a Royal guard,” Hao Ting added with a huge smile.

Xi Gu asked after a small pause, “And what had you planned to do before your brother left?”

“Nothing.”

The guard shrugged his shoulders, and a moment later thought that he really had lived a luxurious life compared to baby Yu, who was now looking down, pensive.

 _“How could have all the adults failed Xi Gu like this?”_ Hao Ting suddenly thought with bitterness. Xi Gu had the entire tower in his possession, but lived in the smallest room; he lived in the Palace and wore the clothes that showed that he belonged to the court, but he had no servants and had to work at such a young age.

Hao Ting suddenly wondered, _“How does Xi Gu fare when he is sick? How does he fight off a cold, alone?”_

Xi Gu looked up, and was startled to see Hao Ting watch him with a painful look on his face.

“What is it?” he asked, worried at another change in Hao Ting’s mood.

“I’m sorry,” Hao Ting said. Tears welled up in the corners of his eyes. In this moment he had no words to express the entirety of his thoughts and emotions. Now he knew why the librarian had been worried that Hao Ting could spoil everything if he pursued Xi Gu half-heartedly.

“Is something wrong?” Xi Gu couldn’t understand why Hao Ting looked so sad.

Hao Ting nodded, but almost immediately answered, “It’s alright. I look at you, and feel happy.”

Xi Gu frowned and moved a bit closer. “It is okay to feel sad. Everyone feels sad from time to time. You don’t have to pretend for me.” A moment later, he added, “Do you want to hear a joke?”

Surprised by Xi Gu’s words, Hao Ting stared at him.

“Ha?!”

Xi Gu was acting more and more peculiar today.

“I don’t know if you’ll like it, but I think it’s funny,” Xi Gu looked away and chucked to himself as he remembered the joke.

As he looked at Xi Gu, Hao Ting himself felt happy.

“Are you trying to cheer me up?” he asked sweetly, and wiped his nose with the back of his hand. “Well, you succeeded.”

“But I haven’t even told you the joke yet.” Xi Gu’s confused face and a slight frown showed Hao Ting that Xi Gu in fact wasn’t flirting.

“Yeah,” Hao Ting said, his eyes smiling at Xi Gu’s innocent ways.

“So, do you want to hear it?” Xi Gu asked once again.

“Okay,” Hao Ting nodded, now anticipating the joke.

“Bread is a lot like the Sun. It rises in the yeast and sets in the waist,” Xi Gu said happily.

Hao Ting blinked a few times.

“I know that the Sun rises in the east, and I suppose it means it sets in the west... But what does it have to do with bread?” he asked slowly, his head tilted in confusion.

He watched Xi Gu’s expression change from excited to disappointed.

And yet, Xi Gu was very patient when he explained the joke. “It is a play on words. Yeast sounds like east, and waist sounds like west.”

Hao Ting just nodded, deciding to think about this later.

“Which reminds me...” Xi Gu then uttered and fumbled for his pouch that he had left on the floor. He got his notebook out of it, and fetched two familiar-looking notes from between its pages.

Xi Gu tried to pretend his cheeks hadn’t turned pink the moment he put the two notes on the quilt between them.

Hao Ting smiled and bit the inside of his cheek. Feeling flustered and not knowing how to react, he just sent Xi Gu a questioning glance.

Xi Gu pointed his finger at the first note.

“You made a mistake here. You spelled your own name correctly, but made a mistake writing my name, and also misspelled almost half of the words in the sentence. The same goes for the second note,” Xi Gu tapped his finger on the second love note that said, _“Baby Yu, wait for me a little more. Tomorrow I’ll be back. Xiang Hao Ting.”_

Xi Gu’s blush had now become evident, but he continued, his voice betraying his confusion, “I was thinking about this all day yesterday. How did you even manage to pass the exam to become a Royal guard in training?”

Hao Ting knew that Xi Gu was right, but he didn’t want to admit to being stupid. Not in front of Yu Xi Gu, at least.

He pointed his finger at the notes and answered, louder than he intended because he felt ashamed and agitated. “Last year I was the best among the other guards! It is true! Go ask Bo Xiang, if you need.”

Xi Gu looked at him, completely dumbfounded, but then nodded.

“I believe you,” he said. His fingers fumbled with his long white sleeves as he debated whether he should say what he wanted to say. “I was also thinking... Would you probably like to study with me?”

“What?” Hao Ting said. He was so shocked, his voice was barely a whisper. At the same time, he wanted to yell happily, and dance, and hug Xi Gu. “Really?”

“If you don’t want to...” Xi Gu began, but Hao Ting interrupted him, jumping to his feet, his voice gaining strength.

“No, I _love_ this idea. Do you really want to teach someone like me?”

Xi Gu only nodded and sent him a soft smile.

“My parents will be so glad! My mother has given up on my education, I think, but if she learns that one of the smartest scholars in this Palace has given me a chance, she will probably faint from happiness!” Hao Ting talked so excitedly, pacing the floor impatiently, that Xi Gu couldn’t help but grinned at him. “Mr. Yu Xi Gu, I will be in you care,” the guard said and bowed respectfully when he stopped in front of Xi Gu.

“What is this?” Xi Gu laughed at that, but, seeing Hao Ting’s determination, he bowed his head in response. “We could meet in the evening when we’re both free, and study here.”

Hao Ting shook his head in agreement and sat back down on the quilt. In the light from the lanterns his eyes were glowing with fondness and gratitude.

Only later in the evening, when he was reading a new book and stealing glances at the beautiful enameled lantern he had put on the low table beside his bed, had Xi Gu remember that he forgot to thank the guard for the gift.


End file.
